Let us remember that, as much has been given us, much will be expected from us, and that true homage comes from the heart as well as from the lips, and shows itself in deeds.[1]
Chapter 9
Matthias’ Story
Matthias’ parents took him to church while he was still in his mother’s womb. When he was a young child, he made a profession of faith and the church baptized him. Matthias was a good kid. It was not that he possessed a strong faith that made him act good, but more because he was afraid of disappointing people by doing wrong. He did everything expected of him out of a sense of duty.
Sailing through high school, Matthias set off for college, bound and determined to make something of his life. The years of watching his parents serve at small, struggling churches left him disappointed with his faith. Seeing the business side of churches and experiencing his family’s generosity being taken advantage of repeatedly, left Matthias determined to become self-sufficient. All of his life, Matthias had people ask him, “Are you going to be a preacher like your father?” That was the last thing Matthias wanted. His plan was to manage a top-flight hotel somewhere in the Caribbean. Funny, how life had not turned out quite that way for him though.
At college, Matthias visited other denominations, to see and experience their forms of worship. Still disillusioned with organized churches, he even tried some small group studies on campus but they did very little for him spiritually.
When Billy Graham came into the area to hold a crusade during his junior year, Matthias was very interested. He had always respected Graham’s ministry and character, and the opportunity to get involved in something of this magnitude was too good to pass up.
Signing up to be a counselor at the crusade required a lot of work. Various churches across the city held training classes, so it was easy for Matthias to find one close to campus. He enjoyed the training and felt excited to be part of something fresh and new.
During the final class, though, Matthias received the surprise of his life. The instructor stopped his teaching, looked straight at him and said, “Young man, God has told me to tell you to stop running from Him. He is calling you to be a missionary for Him.” Matthias was very quick to protest. “Not me. I am going to be a hotel manager. You must be mistaken.” The instructor replied, “Do with it what you will, I am just a messenger.”
Matthias left, somewhat shaken up. “This person doesn’t even know me,” he thought, “Why would he say something like that?” He proceeded to help with the crusade and finished out his junior year. Try as he might, he could not forget the words spoken to him by the instructor.
During the summer break, Matthias decided to visit a friend in Europe. It would be a nice vacation, and though he would not admit it, Matthias was hoping that a change of scenery would help him forget the instructor’s words for a little while. Since his friend was an agnostic, he figured that it would be a very good place to silence his questioning thoughts.
Matthias’ trip went fantastic. Old castles, wonderful museums, different cultures to experience; it was his first time out of the country and he loved every minute of it. The day before his return to the Sates, his friend suggested visiting some new friends she had made in a neighboring town.
Those friends turned out to be Catholic priests training to go to Africa as missionaries. “What an odd coincidence,” Matthias thought. They quickly began to discuss the commonalities and differences of their respective faiths and, as night drew into early morning, an amazing thing occurred. One of the priests looked at Matthias and said, “Young man, you are running away from God. You need to return home. God is calling you to be a missionary for Him.”
Matthias found himself thoroughly shaken. It was almost the exact same words spoken to him by the instructor many months before. No one knew of that earlier conversation. There was no way these priests on another continent could have known. This had to be more than coincidence but Matthias was not ready to listen.
After finishing his vacation, Matthias returned home. He decided to go to a different church in a neighboring city. The pastor was new to the church and no one who attended there knew him. “A fresh start,” Matthias thought, “is just what I need.” Matthias enjoyed the service very much. He made an appointment to talk with the pastor about beliefs and to investigate the process of joining the church.
During his meeting with the pastor, the two discussed their beliefs and Matthias found that the church held views similar to his own. They talked amicably for almost twenty minutes and then something startling happened. The pastor looked over his desk at Matthias and said, “Young man, God is calling you into the ministry but you keep running away from Him.” Matthias stared in disbelief and then, finally, began the journey he had been avoiding all along, the journey to following God’s will for his life.
It would take a few more months before Matthias finally surrendered his desires for his future security over to God. It was a struggle to relinquish his dreams, but when he did, when the last barrier fell, Matthias felt the deep and abiding peace of knowing God’s pleasure with him for the first time in many years. Twenty something years later, Matthias still follows God’s calling and has never once looked back or regretted his decision.
Gone were his fears of not being able to make a good living. Gone were his desires to become someone of note, to make his mark on the world. They were replaced by a knowledge of who he was and his purpose in life. He found how God wanted him to worship and to serve. I know, because Matthias’ story is mine.
After many years of obedience out of a sense of duty, came the freedom that obedience from a sense of devotion and love brings. Finding purpose and approval from God far outweighs any approval needed from man and changes lives, like Matthias’ and mine, forever.
No longer burdened by trying to live up to expectations of family, no longer seeking approval from peers, service to God became a joy instead of drudgery. I came to realize that duty without love or joy meant that I didn’t value or respect the one I was serving – Jesus. That was a very harsh reality to wake up to. As I came to understand the sacrifice Jesus made for me, as I came to understand the depths to which Jesus went, my heart became filled with gratitude. I realized, not just academically, but personally, the love God has for me. That love chased away all the fears that had plagued me. The Bible says that, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”[2]
As I yielded control of my life, my future over to God without reservations or restrictions, His love washed over me and drove away all those fears. No longer did I worry about others would say or think. No longer would I wonder if I could be successful or good enough. I had placed my life into the hands of the One who knows everything, the One who, “works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”[3] I finally comprehended the truth of Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
The New Testament also has a story of a young man whom God called into the ministry. A man who had great things prophesied about him. A man who felt the burden of the great expectations placed on him. One who struggled with who he was and how God wanted to use him. It is the story of Timothy, a most remarkable young man.
[1] Theodore Roosevelt, Proclamation 466, Thanksgiving Day 1901
[2] 1 John 4:8
[3] Romans 8:28
