spiritual

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 2

/ taethne

Years ago I published a book, A Heart Hungry to Worship, (available on Amazon) that focused on relating the stories of Biblical characters to people I have encountered in my ministry. For 2024 I would like to upload a chapter at a time to encourage people. Below is the first chapter from the book. Yet, if he would, man cannot live all to this world. If not religious, he will be superstitious. If he worships not the true God, he will have his idols.[1]

Chapter 1

Sheila and Maggie’s Stories

            Sheila is a creative, vibrant woman in her mid-twenties who is the new owner of her own art gallery. Response in the first few months has been better than expected, but her expectations were not high to begin with.

Sheila is grateful for a chance to start her life over, given that she almost ruined it during her high school years. Known as a wild party girl, Sheila led a life filled with alcohol, drugs and numerous boyfriends. Finding herself pregnant after graduation shocked her. She got an abortion before anyone knew she was pregnant. To her surprise, the experience was not as easy or painless as she believed it would be. The scarring caused by the procedure rendered her incapable of bearing children; nightmares still haunt her sleep two or three times each week.

Her parents are distant. Her mother is an alcoholic, wrapped up in her own miseries, while her father, disgusted by her behavior in high school, has pretty much disowned her. Sheila knows her lifestyle has to change, but the pull of friends who still view her as the party girl is strong. So is facing the continual scrutiny and gossip in her small town.

For the first time in her life, Sheila is contemplating spiritual things. She tried reading an old family Bible a few times, but she could not understand the Victorian-era English. Twice she even tried attending church. Since she had no idea what any of them believed, she tried the large church downtown first. Sheila reasoned that she would be anonymous in a large crowd.

She came away disappointed. She felt as if she had stepped into a cold marble vault. Everything was very solemn and the service was spoken in a foreign language. She did not know when to stand, sit, or when to respond. She could see that for many people it was a meaningful experience, but for her it was just confusing.

The next week she chose a nearby church that had a more modern feel about it. The atmosphere in this church was different: vibrant and alive. While the songs were unfamiliar, at least they were upbeat and the people singing them seemed happy. Then, unexpectedly, multiple people started talking loudly in what sounded to her like multiple languages.  When it reached a crescendo, Sheila was out the door, shaken and confused. Maybe a person had to learn another language to be a Christian. If that was the case, she was out of luck. The one semester of French she took in high school had been a spectacular failure.

It will be awhile before Sheila ventures to church again. Maybe, if she could go with someone who could explain what was going on, she would try. Which church would accept someone with her past, though? The people at the churches she visited already looked like they had their lives together.

Sheila feels guilty about her abortion and believes God will punish her for it. While she longs to know Him, she is deathly afraid of meeting Him because of her past actions. She has reached the point where something has to change in her life. She wonders, “Is there any hope for a person like me? Is there any way to bury the demons from my past that haunt me?”

Sheila has one last straw to which she is clinging. She has a Christian friend that has been supportive and willing to listen to her pour out her heart during late night phone calls. She has kept him at a distance because of her fear of being too vulnerable. He has offered to take her to his church sometime or even hold a Bible study with her.

Maybe, just maybe, Sheila thinks, she will be able to find answers to her questions. While she is not yet ready to visit another church, she is willing to study the Bible with someone who knows and accepts her as a person. Perhaps there is hope for someone like her. There needs to be because she does not think she can face fifty more years like her first twenty-five.

Maggie has just turned forty. A hard working single mother, Maggie has struggled with finding meaningful relationships all of her life. Maggie experienced sexual abuse, as did her older sister, by a distant relative. As is all too often in small communities, where just about everyone is somehow related, very few believed her story and those who did wanted this dirty secret covered up so as not to bring scandal or embarrassment to the family.

            Maggie married young and had two children with a man who turned out to have a problem with drugs. Not wanting to have her children raised around a drug addict, it was not long before she filed for divorce.  After their divorce, she married again, this time to a person who promised her the world but who crushed her spirit by cheating on her. After moving, with three children, to a new town in order to start over, she attempted marriage number three. This marriage started fine but quickly soured due to the suspicious and jealous nature of her husband. Verbal and emotional abuse took its toll and this marriage collapsed after only a few years.

            Maggie vowed not to marry again. She threw herself into her work and her children’s lives. After the oldest two graduated high school, she began to think about herself. She felt she deserved love but was scared and hesitant to make herself vulnerable again.

When an old boyfriend from high school came back into her life, she wondered if he was the love she had been looking for all along.

            The first month flew by. So much for taking it slow, she was falling head over heels in love. He seemed to care about her and her children. He was attentive and caring. Then he got drunk and physically abusive one night and her world shattered, again. “Never again!” she vowed, would she allow herself to open up to anyone who would hurt her. Deep down, though, Maggie still desired to be loved and to love back. Her fear is that her desire for love will open herself up to hurt again.

            Maggie has one philosophy that she believes in: “Everything happens for a reason.” She just cannot grasp the reason behind what has happened to her. “Why was I abused?” ” Why has every marriage failed?” “Why have all my relationships fallen apart when I try so hard?” “When will I ever find love?”

            Maggie thinks of God from time to time. She believes in God, at least the little she has heard about Him. She has only been to church a few times in her life, mostly for funerals. What she believes about God is that He is a person worth knowing, someone who is perfect and holy and who expects His followers to be that way. She doesn’t feel she would qualify to be a follower because of her past failures. She doesn’t believe that God would want anything to do with her. Maggie lives without hope and truly believes she will spend life after death in hell; “After all,” she thinks, “It cannot be much worse than the life I am living now.”

            Deep down she would like a relationship she can count on, but she is so terrified of being disappointed again that she is not even willing to give God a chance to initiate one with her.

            Maggie and Sheila’s stories are not unique. In fact, their stories are of people I know and work with who have had similar life experiences. I count them as my friends but I have yet to penetrate the shields they have erected around their lives.

            I long to offer them the hope they so desperately need but are afraid to accept. We talk often, especially when crisis happens in their life. They know they need help beyond that which humans can offer, but they are not ready to ask God. Their reasoning is simple: “God is my only hope and if He lets me down, I truly have nothing and no one left.”

            The Bible contains the story of a person just like Maggie and Sheila. With a past that haunts her, this woman finds herself constantly entering one failed relationship after another. A woman who is desperate to find love, who wants to believe that God can love her, but who struggles to make sense of the world she finds herself in. Let us look at her story.

[1] Theodore Parker, The Transient and the Permanent

Blessed Are They …

/ taethne

I have spent a lot of time over the years working as a hospice chaplain. It amazes me how many homes I go into where the family has little or no contact with organized religion. It is in those homes, though, where I am able to minister as a chaplain more than I can as a pastor. As a pastor, I am seen as a guardian of a particular denomination. As a chaplain, I come across as less threatening. As a pastor, I am seen as trying to persuade someone to my church. As a chaplain, I am seen as a person truly interested in someone’s spiritual well being. I have also recently read some good pieces of literature relating to hospice, dying and dignity. Let me share two of those with you today.

The first is by Gwendolyn London and is remarkably profound:

“We must realize that dying is a spiritual process with medical implications, not a medical process with spiritual implications.”

 

The second is a poem by Malcomb Goldsmith, from his book: In A Strange Land: People with Dementia and the Local Church

Blessed are they who understand,  my faltering steps and shaking hand

Blessed are they who know my ears today, must strain to catch the words they say

Blessed are they with cheery smile, who stop to chat for a little while

Blessed are those who never say, “You’ve told us that story twice today.”

Blessed are they who make it known, that I’m loved, respected and not alone.

 

And I would add, blessed are those who reach out to the dying, to bring the love and witness of Jesus Christ one last time to souls who need Him

 

Where Are You At?

/ taethne

Sounds like a funny title to a blog, doesn’t it? What do you mean, where am I at? Spiritually, emotionally, where are you right now? Let me give you a story to illustrate.

Imagine a day at the beach. The sun is shining, a cool off-shore breeze is blowing. Families are having fun. Suddenly, there’s a scream, “Help me! I’m drowning!” Waves of panic engulf the beach. The once-quiet sunbathers point wildly at a figure just beyond the breaking surf. A lifeguard races down the beach and swims toward the sinking person. Thrashing furiously, pair of hands suddenly reappears out of the deep. The drowning person is in an intense struggle between life and death.

Now let me ask you, do you identify with the drowning person, the trained lifeguard, or the powerless spectators? You are in at least one of those categories. Let me help you understand.

Right now, you may be overwhelmed by sorrow and you may be grasping, like a drowning person, for the answers to a multitude of “why” questions. Perhaps you are more like  the spectators, you are feeling grossly inadequate  as you try to assist a friend who is hurting. You may identify with the lifeguard, you have tried to help so many people and you are worn out, both from rescuing some and from the devastation at not being able to help others.

It is important to realize that in each of these states of mind, the answer is the same. We have to learn to lean on Jesus. Only He can save everyone. Only He has the answers to life’s questions. Only He can take broken, useless lives and make them whole again. Remember the old nursery rhyme?

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall

All the kings’s horses and all the king’s men

Couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty together again

Thanks be to God that Jesus specializes in putting broken things back together. What we cannot do, He can. Not only can He put shattered lives back together, He can make them stronger and more beautiful than they were before. Give Him the pieces of your life today and watch what He can do with it. You won’t be disappointed.

 

Excerpt From A Heart Hungry to Worship (Free on Kindle this weekend)

/ taethne

The Holy Spirit has instructed Philip to make contact with the Ethiopian and he does so. Running alongside the chariot, he hears the eunuch reading from Isaiah. In those days, it was customary to read aloud, not silently when one read to their self. Philip asks him a simple question: “Do you understand what you are reading?” The English translation does not do justice to the original Greek wording. Philip’s question really asks the eunuch if what he is reading has any meaning for him, if what he is reading makes any sense.

The response is so telling! It is a response of frustration, discouragement and disappointment. “How can I, unless someone explains it to me?” Despite his apparent regalia and retinue, no one in Jerusalem had taken the time to answer his questions. No one helped quench his thirst for the knowledge of the One True God. He had a copy of the Scriptures, but could not understand what the words meant. He could read them, he was an educated man fluent in languages, but the meaning, the import, and the supernatural impact of the words eluded him.

There is a reason why the Bible says that only those who are spiritual can understand spiritual things.[1] Until a person comes to submit their life to the Lord Jesus, the Bible depicts them as spiritually blind, unable to see or comprehend spiritual truths.[2] They need the Holy Spirit to open their spiritual eyes and illuminate their minds. Often, the Spirit uses believers, like Philip, in that process.

The Ethiopian invites Philip up into his chariot and asks him a question about the passage he is reading. “Who is the prophet referring to?” Without being able to identify the subject talked about, a person cannot make a proper interpretation. Philip begins introducing the Ethiopian to Jesus through this passage. The Book of Isaiah was tailor-made for a person like this Ethiopian. It’s in Isaiah that many prophecies of Jesus’ birth and reign are found.[3] It’s in Isaiah where one finds promises to eunuchs of their inclusion in God’s Holy Temple[4] alongside other worshippers of God. Isaiah described God Himself, high and lifted up, as having compassion on people who have wandered away from the truth; who are like sheep.[5]

Philip begins with the passage the Ethiopian is wrestling with and uses it as a springboard to tell the story of Jesus, God’s Messiah. As Philip expounds the meaning of what the Ethiopian was reading God’s Spirit illuminates his mind. Now, he realizes how a person is to worship God. Now, he realizes that it’s not at a Temple made by human hands but through faith in Jesus Christ that a person comes to approach God. As they pass by some water, he interrupts Philip to ask, “Is there anything that hinders me from being baptized right now?” He understands; he wants to identify with Jesus Christ and he desires to proclaim his newfound faith.

Water baptism was quite common in those days. In Judaism, it stood as a symbol for a Gentile’s repentance and conversion to Israel’s religion. In Christianity, it stands for each person’s repentance and as a symbol of his or her submission to Christ’s Lordship.

Philip baptizes the Ethiopian, which shows us an important picture. Philip, an olive skinned man, baptizes the Ethiopian, a black man, into the fellowship of the church. Philip, a former adherent to Judaism, and the Ethiopian, a former adherent to the religion of Meroe, become equal in standing before Christ. In Christ, racial barriers, national barriers, cultural barriers fall. Each person finds themselves equal at the foot of the Cross.

[1] 1 Corinthians 2:13-16

[2] 2 Corinthians 4:3-4

[3] Isaiah 7:14, 11:1-16

[4] Isaiah 56:3-8

[5] Isaiah 6:1-4, 53:6

Great Quotes From Ages Past #7

/ taethne

This is one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite preachers – Jonathan Edwards

 

“Spiritual emotions result in Christian practice because their object is the loveliness of spiritual things, not our self-interest. People have a defective Christianity because they are seeking their own interests in it, not God’s. So they accept Christianity only to the extent that they think it serves their interests. By contrast, a person who accepts it for its own excellent and lovely nature, accepts everything which has that nature.”