Saul

A Sheep’s Journey Through Psalms -142

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Finding Refuge

Dear friend, there are seasons when life feels like a cold, dark cave—lonely, confining, and full of unseen dangers. In those moments, even the strongest among us can feel overwhelmed, abandoned, and unsure of the next step. Psalm 142 meets us right there. Written by David as a maskil (a contemplative psalm of instruction) “when he was in the cave,” it invites us into an honest conversation with God from the lowest of places.

The Cry of a Desperate Heart (vv. 1-2)

“I cry aloud to the LORD; I lift up my voice to the LORD for mercy. I pour out my complaint before him; I tell my trouble before him.” (ESV)

David doesn’t whisper polite prayers—he cries aloud. He pours out his complaint like a man emptying his pockets before a trusted friend. In the cave of Adullam (likely 1 Samuel 22), David was on the run from King Saul, hiding in darkness while his life hung in the balance. No throne, no army, just a handful of distressed men eventually joining him. Yet he turns fully to the Lord with raw honesty.

What a tender invitation this is for us. God is not shocked or offended by our complaints. He welcomes them. He wants the real you—the tired, fearful, overwhelmed you.

When Your Spirit Grows Faint (vv. 3-4)

“When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way! In the path where I walk they have hidden a snare for me. Look to the right and see: there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul.”

Here is the heart of David’s pain: isolation. His spirit (his inner strength) is fainting. Enemies have laid traps. And when he looks for human support—someone to stand at his right hand, the place of a defender—there is no one. “No one cares for my soul.” Those words can sting, can’t they?

Yet even in this, David anchors himself in a beautiful truth: You know my way. God sees the path, the snares, the loneliness. He hasn’t lost track of His servant. In the cave, when every human support failed, David discovered that the Lord was more than enough.

Personal Reflection:
Think of a “cave” season you’ve walked through or are in now. When your spirit grew faint and support felt far away, how did (or how can) remembering that God knows your way bring comfort?

Declaring God as Refuge and Portion (vv. 5-6)

“I cry to you, O LORD; I say, ‘You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living.’ Attend to my cry, for I am brought very low! Deliver me from my persecutors, for they are too strong for me!”

In the midst of weakness, David makes two powerful declarations. First, “You are my refuge”—my safe hiding place. The cave was temporary shelter, but the Lord was his true fortress. Second, “You are my portion”—my inheritance, my enough. When everything else was stripped away, God Himself was David’s treasure.

This is exegetical gold for the Christian life. In Christ, we have an even greater refuge. The One who knows our lowest moments has already entered the ultimate cave of death and risen victorious. Our portion is a loving Father who calls us His children.

Personal Reflection:
What would it look like today for you to declare, “Lord, You are my refuge and my portion”? In what area of life do you need to stop looking to people or circumstances to be what only God can be?

Hope and a Future Song (v. 7)

“Bring me out of prison, that I may give thanks to your name! The righteous will surround me, for you will deal bountifully with me.”

David ends not in despair but in expectant hope. He asks to be brought out so he can praise God publicly, surrounded by the righteous. And he believes God will “deal bountifully” with him. From the cave, David looks forward to community, thanksgiving, and God’s generous goodness.This is the movement of faith: honest lament leads to renewed trust, which births hope and praise. Many of us know how this story continued—David did come out, became king, and led God’s people. But even more wonderfully, our ultimate deliverance is secure in Jesus.

Closing Prayer

Lord, thank You for meeting us in our caves. When we feel faint, alone, or trapped, help us cry out to You with honesty and trust. You are our Refuge and our Portion. Draw near to the weary today, attend to our cries, and bring us out in Your perfect timing so we can praise You with others. We believe You will deal bountifully with us. In the name of Jesus, our ultimate Deliverer, Amen.

Friend, whatever cave you find yourself in today, you are not alone. The same God who sustained David knows your way and loves you deeply. Pour out your heart—He is listening.

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 9

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True biblical worship so satisfies our total personality that we don’t have to shop around for man-made substitutes.[1]

Chapter 8

Saul of Tarsus

The story of Saul of Tarsus is one of the most dramatic stories of all time. He explodes onto the scene in the book of the Acts of the Apostles as a terrifying figure. Highly educated and possessing a formidable personality coupled with fanatic devotion, Saul enters the Biblical record as a sworn enemy of Christianity.

Saul is first seen in the Bible standing in approval at the stoning death of Stephen, a deacon in the early church. Following Stephen’s death, Saul is revealed as the instigator in the systematic persecution of the fledgling church. Not content with shattering the church in Jerusalem, Saul obtains permission from the religious leaders to seek out the followers of Jesus wherever they may be, going as far as Damascus, Syria, in zealous pursuit of his targets.

What made Saul so dangerous was his belief system. Saul was a devout Jew, a member of their Sanhedrin and the protégé of the greatest rabbi of that time. Saul was so adamant in his beliefs that he developed a very rigid and intolerant view of any Jewish person who embraced anything other than the Judaism he espoused.

Saul was the most dangerous type of person there is – one who believes, beyond any doubt, that he is acting on God’s behalf and is not subject to any other authority. His mentality was that of the “repent or die” variety. Today, we would probably label Saul as a religious extremist or a terrorist on par with the zealots in the Taliban. Saul acted to keep his religion pure. He wanted it free from the influence of Jesus of Nazareth, who claimed to be the Jewish Messiah, the fulfillment of prophecy.

Saul’s life undergoes a dramatic change one day. He is exposed to the God he claimed to serve and leaves the encounter a changed and humbled man. Interestingly, God used blindness to deliver part of His lesson to Saul, just as He did with Jie Li.

The Bible records the story in Acts, chapter 9. Saul was traveling to Damascus when, suddenly, a bright light enveloped him and a voice from heaven spoke.

“Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?”[2]

Saul realizes that he is in the presence of the supernatural and his question seems to be one of clarification. Is it God, Himself, speaking or an angelic messenger? To his surprise, the voice identifies himself as Jesus. Saul’s shock is evident. He is bent on destroying the followers of Jesus, believing that Jesus was a charlatan, a fake, and now he is faced with overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Jesus speaks from heaven. He is divine.

Blind from the heavenly light, humbled by the voice of Jesus, Saul is led to Damascus a thoroughly confused man. For a number of days he is alone with his thoughts, coming to terms with the difference between what he always believed to be true and truth itself.

During the time Saul is contemplating all that is happening to him, God is busy preparing the next step in drawing Saul to the worship of His Son. God speaks to a Christian believer, Anaias, and tells him to go find Saul and speak to him.

Anaias is naturally afraid. Christians are in hiding because of Saul’s activities and now God is asking him to approach Saul directly. Anaias is hesitant, clearly wondering if God can possibly be serious. He is assured that not only does God want him to visit Saul, but also that God is in the middle of drafting Saul into service for the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Anaias finds Saul, puts his hands on Saul’s head as he prays for him and, just like Jie Li; God answers the prayer and restores sight to Saul. Saul now has a choice to make. For three days, he has prayed to God for clarification, guidance, and wisdom. Anaias challenges Paul with a mini-sermon followed by a question:

“The God of our fathers has chosen you, that you should know His will, and see that Just One (Jesus) and should hear the voice of His mouth. For you shall be His witness unto all men of what you have seen and heard. Why now do you tarry? Arise, be baptized and wash away your sins, calling on the name of the Lord”[3]

Saul is a thoroughly changed man. He does get up and become a Christian. He has accepts the incontrovertible evidence that Jesus is God’s Messiah. He did not just hear a voice and see a bright light. Scripture is clear that Paul beheld the resurrected Christ. He wrestled with this vision for three days and concluded that he had been wrong in his beliefs about Jesus, Christianity, and salvation from God.  For a person of his position, status and temperament, this is a miraculous change. God will use the zeal that characterized Saul and direct it into taking Jesus’ Gospel into the rest of the world. The champion of Jewish orthodoxy would become the champion of the Christian faith. The change is so dramatic that Saul starts using the Greek form of his name, Paul, to symbolize that he is no longer the same individual.

Saul, now Paul, becomes an evangelist, missionary, church planter, and author of the majority of the New Testament. His great intellect, his religious training, and his personality are used by God to spread Christianity throughout Asia Minor and Europe. He truly fulfills Anaias’ prophecy concerning him as Paul will witness before kings, civic leaders, and military commanders across the Mediterranean world. He becomes an unapologetic spokesperson for the Lord Jesus Christ.

The conversion Saul experienced, while dramatic, is not unique. Millions of people throughout the last two millennia have come to determine that Jesus Christ truly is God’s Messiah, the only way to eternal life. No matter how hostile or how angry a person may be towards Jesus, there is always hope for them. God continues to call men and women from all temperaments, all backgrounds, and all personalities through the Holy Spirit to Himself.

There are times when the Holy Spirit gently persuades men and women of the truth about Jesus Christ. There are other times when He uses very dramatic methods. Some people, like Saul, have a great desire to worship God but their idea of how to worship Him is flawed. In His graciousness, God takes measures to correct their thinking, revealing to them the proper way to worship. Other people have no idea of how to worship Him at all, like the Samaritan woman. They have given up in despair of finding a relationship with God. Gently, the Holy Spirit draws them to Jesus Christ, restoring hope to their lives. God knows what each person’s personality is like. He knows the backgrounds they come from. He understands the questions, objections, and longings that fill each of us because He made us to worship Him. He continues to draw us so that we can come into a relationship with Him that enables us to worship Him properly.

Both Jie Li and Saul stand as examples that no one is beyond the reach of God. There is no person who is too bad or who has done too much wrong for God to reach and draw into a personal relationship with Himself. In the words of Saul,

“This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the chief.”[4]

If God can save someone like Saul, a murderous fanatic, or Jie Li, an underworld crime boss, then He can save anyone. This gives everyone of us hope and a reason to celebrate.

[1] Warren Wiersbe, The Integrity Crisis

[2] Acts 9:4

[3] Acts 22:14-16

[4] 1 Timothy 1:15