A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 6

“Dear God, 
I am so afraid to open my clenched fists! 
Who will I be when I have nothing left to hold on to? 
Who will I be when I stand before you with empty hands? 
Please help me to gradually open my hands 
and to discover that I am not what I own, 
but what you want to give me.”[1]

Chapter 5

Renaldo and Lance’s Stories

            Renaldo rode his bicycle to work, head down against the brisk, chill wind. He mentally beat himself up for driving with a suspended license the week before. It certainly was stupid, but it beat biking to work in the winter. If only he had paid more attention to the cop who was behind him, maybe he wouldn’t be freezing this morning.

            Renaldo was very good at his construction job, which was the only reason his boss kept him on. He had numerous run-ins with the law; DUI’s, fights in bars, drunk and disorderly conduct, etc. When sober, Renaldo did great work; his skills at carpentry and mason work were second-to-none. When he drank, it was a different story.

            Twice married, he was involved in an on-again, off-again relationship with a girl he had dated back in high school, twenty years earlier. The relationship was off now and instead of living at her house, Renaldo had only a little camper that he pulled with his pick-up. 

While he loved construction work, most places in town wouldn’t employ him anymore. Too many work days missed because he was in jail for something or other (most times he couldn’t remember what he was charged with) too many fights with co-workers after hours;  all of these things limited the number of companies which were willing to hire him. His current employer used him on only the most difficult jobs, on a contract basis.

Renaldo reflected on his life as he rode. He wondered how it had turned out this way. He remembered his grandmother; she had passed away last year and he still missed her, terribly. She had raised him from the age of four until he had dropped out of high school and married at sixteen.

“If ever there was a saint,” he mused, “It was grandmother.” She had made sure to take him with her to church and Sunday School every week. He remembered how he had chafed as a teenager, sitting on those hard wood benches as the preacher droned on and on in a monotone voice. Something must have stuck with him, though. He could still remember songs from Sunday School, making crafts at the summer Bible School and somewhere in his camper was the little New Testament he received as a prize for memorizing Scripture verses.

He thought of his grandmother’s last few days. He sat in her room at the nursing home for a week straight, afraid that if he left even for a little while that she would die before he returned. He also thought of the young pastor, about his age, which had spent almost as much time with her as he had. It was obvious that he was close to her as well. Renaldo remembered his grandmother’s last night. Weakly, but distinctly, he heard her say the words to her favorite hymn repeatedly.

He also remembered that he had promised her that he would go back to church. It was time, he resolved, to keep his promise. He would go to his grandmother’s church to honor her memory. Renaldo hoped it would not be as boring as he remembered.

The next Sunday Renaldo showed up for the morning service. He wore his best clothes – jeans that were not too faded and a shirt he had picked up at the Salvation Army thrift store. He felt out of place at first, but then he saw many older people whom he remembered as his grandmother’s friends. He even saw his old Sunday School teacher, who not only remembered him but also welcomed him warmly and invited him to sit next to her.

The thing that struck him the most about the service was the sermon. The pastor was not boring. In fact, he talked about the struggles various people encountered in life and how the Bible talked about Jesus’ promise to be with his followers through their struggles. He was surprised to hear this, since he thought Christians didn’t have (or weren’t supposed to have) problems.

After the service, the pastor asked him how he was doing and expressed how much he missed Renaldo’s grandmother. Before he realized it, Renaldo accepted an invitation to dinner with the pastor’s family later in the week. “Great,” he thought, “He will badger me about Jesus and stuff.” Still, a promise was a promise and Renaldo did his best to keep his promises.

At dinner that Thursday night, Renaldo was surprised to find he was having fun. The pastor’s wife had fixed a simple meal but to Renaldo it tasted better than what he usually heated up on his camp stove. It turned out that the family played board games at suppertime and Renaldo was invited to play with them. After supper, the kids went off to do their chores while the pastor and Renaldo sat on the porch with coffee.

“Here it comes,” he thought, “Now is the time for the Jesus speech.” Instead, the pastor shared his memories of his grandmother and Renaldo responded with his own. As the evening ended, the pastor invited Roberto to drop by anytime he needed to talk, wanted a home-cooked meal or just to hang out. As they walked to the door, the pastor told Renaldo that his grandmother had prayed for him every day. “Every day she prayed you would come back to church. I believe she is very happy to see you come back as she watches from heaven.”

Renaldo lay in his camper that night and decided that he’d go back to church on Sunday. The people were nice, no one looked down on him and he really liked how the pastor’s family treated him. If that is how Christians acted, maybe becoming one wasn’t such a bad thing after all. He would have to give it some serious thought.

As the months went by, Renaldo continued to attend the services at the church. Various members of the church hired him to do construction work on the side, which really helped him to financially get ahead a little bit. He volunteered to help with the sound system, as it allowed him to attend services but keep his distance by being sequestered in the sound room. A church leader even asked him to participate in church activities, to help chaperone some teenage boys on a trip. At first, he protested, saying he wouldn’t be a good role model because of the troubles in his past. They told him that was exactly what would make a good chaperone. With him on guard, none of the kids would be able to get by with anything because he already knew all the tricks. Little by little, Renaldo was drawn into the life of the church.

Slowly, Renaldo came to realize that more than anything, he wanted a life like the people in the church, and one like his grandmother had lived. One Sunday morning he surprised himself by walking up to the pastor and saying, “I am ready to stop running my life my way. All I do is mess it up. I want Jesus to take control of it.”

Renaldo had finally found what he had been searching for in his life. God had drawn Renaldo and his life would never be the same. I know this, because I was the young pastor that ministered to Renaldo.

While he still has a way to go in dealing with the consequences of his past actions, Renaldo does not have to face them alone anymore. The Holy Spirit continues to draw Renaldo into a closer relationship with God, who cares about him, and a closer relationship with a church family who is willing to help.

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Lance was a long-time member of our church. He had been there years prior to my becoming pastor, though much about him remained a mystery. Lance would attend for a few weeks and then disappear for months at a time. When he showed back up, he was always living at a different address and recently employed at either a menial job or unemployed.

For years, the church had been generous to Lance. Both corporately and individually, the church members helped him financially, found jobs for him and even bought him furniture and food. He was always appreciative and grateful. Lance promised each time to repay those who had helped him, but no one ever expected him to. It seemed that he was just one of those people, who tried hard, but could never get ahead. Everyone liked him, but no one really knew anything about Lance. He kept his personal life private, even though many people made the effort to get to know him better.

One fall, Lance attended a series of revival services at church. The Holy Spirit did a mighty work on him that evening. Lance stood in the back, tears running down his face during the closing song. Before the service could end, he came to the front of the sanctuary and asked if he could address the church for a few minutes. The story he shared with us that night stunned everyone in the building.

Lance confessed to the church that he had been scamming them for years. He was actually pretty well off, financially. The reason for his disappearances for weeks at a time was that he went to Alaska and Canada to work. Sometimes, he would work on fishing vessels, other times in the oil fields. He confessed that he made very good money. In between jobs, he would come back home and rent a place to live by the week. While he didn’t need money, he said that it was just so easy to ask the church for help, knowing that they would oblige. The money and food he kept, furniture and other clothes he sold for even more money.

Lance went on to say that until that night, he had never felt a minute of regret for taking advantage of the church’s generosity. He went on to say that he was sorry, that God’s Spirit had convicted him of his thieving and lying, and that he had asked forgiveness from God. Now, he was wondering, could the church forgive him?

There was a silence across the congregation for almost a full minute as his words sunk in. One could see people struggling to process what they had just heard. Finally, hemmed in by people on both sides of his seat, Doug rose up. He had given Lance a lot of money over the years.  Not waiting for those around him to let him out of the row, Doug climbed over the pews and made his way forward. Lance visibly flinched, expecting the worse. Instead, he found the best.

Grabbing him in a hug, Doug publically forgave him. He rejoiced that God had reached Lance’s heart and changed it. The rest of the church was not far behind. Lance experienced the cleansing power of forgiveness that night. He was welcomed into the fellowship of his church family again. His heart became free to worship God, as the bonds of his sinful actions were broken. He was drawn back to God by the convicting power of the Holy Spirit, much like the famous story of the Prodigal Son, found in Luke, chapter 15.


[1] Henry Nouwen, The Only Necessary Thing: Living a Praying Life

A Heart Hungry To Worship part 4

The next chapter from the book A Heart Hungry To Worship (available on Amazon) – Dinah’s Story

Before there can be fullness there must
be emptiness.  Before God can fill us with Himself, we must first be emptied of ourselves.[1]

Chapter 3

Dinah’s Story

            The rapping sound on the door startled me. It was late in the evening and I wasn’t expecting company. I opened the door to find Dinah standing there, looking angry and confused. She asked if she could come in and ask some questions, so I invited her inside and we sat down in the living room. Dinah told me she just left a meeting with her church leaders, asking them to answer a couple of questions that I had given to her a couple of weeks earlier. She informed me that not only was she dissatisfied with the answers they gave her, but also that one question was answered with, “Well, technically, he is correct.”

            Dinah was facing a crossroads of faith. On one side was a belief system she had grown up with, embraced and taught to others that was now being challenged. On the other side were answers from Scripture that stood at odds with what she’d always believed. To change her mind meant admitting that she was wrong and that she had taught her family and other people wrong beliefs as well. This is why she showed up at my door, angry and confused.

            Dinah and I met some months earlier when she showed up at our church. Her daughter, in the military at the time, had joined a church affiliated with our denomination. Dinah took this as a personal affront, an abandonment of beliefs held by their family for generations. She came to our church seeking to know what we believed and how our beliefs differed from hers in the hopes of confronting her daughter and bringing her back to their denomination.

            What Dinah found was her own beliefs being confronted. I answered her questions about our beliefs on varying topics in return for her telling me what her church taught about them. I then suggested we take our church’s official statements of belief and compare them to Scripture and to each other. Where we found discrepancies, I asked her to go back to her leaders and seek understanding of why they believed as they did.

            For weeks, we met, going through doctrine after doctrine. Slowly, she came to an understanding that many of the beliefs she held did not match up to the clear teaching of the Bible. During one session with her leaders, Dinah told me that they said to her that their traditions held the same weight as Scripture. We then looked at verses in the Bible that addressed that issue as well. Dinah began to get frustrated with her leaders as answer after answer came back to “tradition” and not because their belief system was undergirded by God’s Word.

            Finally, there came the night when she appeared at my door. We both knew what it was costing her that night. Pride warred with truth. One of the big hurdles for her to overcome was the fact that by admitting the beliefs she had held for years were wrong, she was also admitting she had taught those wrong beliefs to her family and many others through her work for her denomination. The guilt she was feeling warred with her pride. I silently prayed that the Holy Spirit would cause her to understand the truth of Jesus’ statement, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”[2]

Sensing that she was close to making a major decision, I asked her to meet with me the following evening and bring her husband, Ted. A quiet man, Ted would sometimes accompany Dinah when we talked about beliefs and I wanted him to be there with her. While Ted had not participated in our discussions very often, I surmised from the comments that he did interject that he was also wrestling with the same doubts.

            The next evening, I sat down with the two of them and asked a simple, yet direct question. “Now that we have exhausted all your questions about doctrines and beliefs, what is keeping you from entering into a personal relationship with Jesus?” They replied, “Nothing.”

Dinah and Ted both gave their lives over to the Savior that night.

Dinah had read the Bible many times in her life. She never understood the meaning of the words she read until the Holy Spirit started illuminating them. She knew that the Bible contained truths. Her problem, like so many other people’s problem, was that she looked to human tradition instead of Scripture alone. When confronted with clear differences between the two, she realized she had a choice to make. Would she hold to her tradition out of stubborn pride, or would she yield to the teachings of God’s Word?

Dinah and Ted studied the Bible diligently from that night on. They began a spiritual journey that led both of them, in their sixties, to move to another community and help start a new church. Their hearts responded to God’s Word and they began to worship the Creator the way that He intended for them to worship Him. All they needed was for someone to explain to them the meaning of the Scriptures they were reading.

The Bible contains the story of a man who knew God’s Word held answers for his life, but who needed someone to explain their meaning to him. It is the story of the Ethiopian in the Book of Acts.


[1] A.W. Tozer, How to be Filled With the Spirit

[2] John 8:32

Knowing the Heart and Soul of a Fellow Believer

One of the greatest things about the 18 years we served churches in Montana was the lack of sectarianism. By this I mean those who were of the Reformed or Armenian or Calvinist or even Wesleyan belief systems worked well together. Those issues were not a litmus test for brothers and sisters working together on projects much too large for one church. Part of the reason was the geographical situation. Churches were often isolated from other churches of the same denomination. My own, for example, was 110 miles removed from the next church of the same denomination. Throw in Montana’s abysmally cold and long winter which forbids travelling long distances much of the time and one learns how to play nice with one’s neighbors. I spoke at our churches, Lutheran churches, Methodist congregations and had great rapport with the ministers of the Assembly, 7th Day Adventist and Disciples of Christ churches. This was necessary to reach a town that had never seen an outbreak of revival in anyone’s memory. We knew each other intimately. We knew each other’s families. We prayed and labored together. Did we have our differences? Yes. We didn’t sweep them under the rug or compromise – we discussed them, rationally, like adults and joined where we could, such as on issues of the right to life. We knew each others hearts and never demonized the other.

I well remember rumors, unfounded of course, that flew one year about my family and I. At a ministerial meeting, the other pastors pledged to address this from their pulpits, set the record straight and they did so. This show of support was overwhelming and much appreciated. In this atmosphere, the gospel witness went forth.

Unfortunately,  this did not last. Even more unfortunately, the disruption came from within my own denomination. There were many who came in, from down South, with preconceived ideas and agendas that ruined a sweet fellowship. Adherence to a particular interpretation of Scripture became the basis for isolating and minimizing churches and pastors who failed to follow those in positions of power. The same has been experienced in church after church here in Georgia after our relocation. I long for the days when church leaders got together to know, intimately, the heart and soul of fellow ministers. I long for the time when differences of opinion can be discussed rationally, like adults if not like Christians without demonizing those who differ. It may be that I am wrong in an area of doctrine or you may be wrong. We may even both be wrong because I have yet to meet a single person who understands every aspect of Scripture. I have met many who think they do but that’s another story.

In the midst of this, though, I do find hope. From some in my denomination, though not many. I find it from others who have taken the time to get to know their fellow ministers as a person. They may have met them at a hospital, visiting on the same floor, traveled on the same flight together or met at a community event. This gives me hope. Our ministry spans denominations as in many countries there are ones not even represented here in the States. We don’t make churches who ask for help fill out a questionnaire – we go and help. They will take what they agree with and toss the rest, we know. But it is freely offered to all the same. Ta Ethne is somewhat Reformed in its leanings but our most faithful supporters are Wesleyan. They know our heart and work with us. We have Calvinists and Armenians both who advise us and help edit our resources. How can this be? Because God is bigger than all of us. He knows our heart and soul and we should get to know the heart and soul of His children as well. We have also been shunned by others who thought we were too “Presbyterian” and by others who felt we were too “liberal” (whatever that means). Others have questioned how a “Calvinistic-leaning” organization could be so mission-minded (guess they haven’t read our books) and still others thought we played and worked too much with our Wesleyan friends (although I would never give up those friendships). Both sides (or maybe all 4 sides) have labeled us as somethings or other at various times. I just shake my head and forge on as God directs. I would rather describe us as followers of Jesus Christ helping other followers of Jesus Christ become mature disciples.

It is far easier to dismiss someone if you don’t personally know them. Getting to know people shakes up your assumptions and the parroting of beliefs held by others. I remember my first trip to Malaysia, a Muslim nation, and having every assumption I had crushed. They were the most open and friendly of people, full of questions and having a desire to know my beliefs. From mosques to bazaars we encountered curiosity and developed friendships. I learned about the Koran and Muslim beliefs from practicing adherents and they learned of Christianity and the Bible from me. We discussed and argued civilly, respecting each other while differing. The same held true on my trips to China, Japan, Korea, Hong Kong and other places. I find it sad that I find more civility and respect in foreign countries from those with differing beliefs than in the Bible Belt.

Oh, how I long for an outpouring of the Spirit to bring about a melting of hearts, a desire for civility. I long for ministers of the gospel to get to know other leaders as people. Invite them over for a meal, go on a retreat with them, study Scripture together regularly — get to know their heart and soul. You may just win a friend for life or even for eternity. You might also become a far better minister

Blessed Are They …

I have spent a lot of time over the years working as a hospice chaplain. It amazes me how many homes I go into where the family has little or no contact with organized religion. It is in those homes, though, where I am able to minister as a chaplain more than I can as a pastor. As a pastor, I am seen as a guardian of a particular denomination. As a chaplain, I come across as less threatening. As a pastor, I am seen as trying to persuade someone to my church. As a chaplain, I am seen as a person truly interested in someone’s spiritual well being. I have also recently read some good pieces of literature relating to hospice, dying and dignity. Let me share two of those with you today.

The first is by Gwendolyn London and is remarkably profound:

“We must realize that dying is a spiritual process with medical implications, not a medical process with spiritual implications.”

 

The second is a poem by Malcomb Goldsmith, from his book: In A Strange Land: People with Dementia and the Local Church

Blessed are they who understand,  my faltering steps and shaking hand

Blessed are they who know my ears today, must strain to catch the words they say

Blessed are they with cheery smile, who stop to chat for a little while

Blessed are those who never say, “You’ve told us that story twice today.”

Blessed are they who make it known, that I’m loved, respected and not alone.

 

And I would add, blessed are those who reach out to the dying, to bring the love and witness of Jesus Christ one last time to souls who need Him

 

Why the Majority of my Friends are Unbelievers

Recently, a group of Christian leaders and I were discussing our lives outside of our official capacities. I startled some of them when I stated that most of my friends were unbelievers. “Why?” was the question asked of me. I answered that I had many reasons. One, because there is a tendency among Christians to only hang out with others who believe like them. Instead of engaging the culture around them, they isolate themselves in pockets of piety. Another reason is that it gives me an opportunity to build relationships with people and actually witness to them by my life, as I live out my beliefs. It is kind of difficult to keep either the Great Commission or the Great Commandment when you only surround yourself with fellow Pharisees. The biggest reason though is quite simple. Since I believe that there is only one way to heaven, I also believe that my unbelieving friends will not go with me there. This is the only time I have to spend with them and I want to make the most of it. Yes, I would like to see them become believers – I pray for God’s Spirit to enlighten them daily to the truth. I am cognizant that my words and actions speak volumes about God and I am conscious of redeeming the time and conversations I have with them. I love them and if this is the only time I have with them, if they never become believers and I lose my relationship with them forever – at last I will have had a good one. I will make up time missed with my brothers and sisters in Christ in the forever of heaven, but in the here and now I will continue to spend time with my unsaved friends, in whatever time God will grace me to have with them and continue to pray that they come to be forever friends before it is too late.

Watching the Flock

While attending a church service this week, the speaker made a very good point. His sermon was on being a good shepherd to the flock God has entrusted to us as pastors, just as He is a Good Shepherd to His flock. During the speaker’s message, he made this observation; while we are watching our flock, so are spiritual predators. We must be constantly vigilant in overseeing the safety of those God has entrusted to us. The shepherd has the responsibility for more than just feeding the sheep, he must also protect them. As King David fought off lions and bears that attacked his father’s sheep when he was just a shepherd boy, we, too must fight off those who would devour our Father’s  sheep.

It is our job to warn the sheep of danger. It is our job to point out theological errors they may encounter, dangerous cults, erroneous worldviews, and false teachers. We must point out these things because if we do not, our sheep will wander off and become mired in a quagmire of false doctrines that will render them useless to the Kingdom of God. Yes, we must feed our sheep solid food, great teaching from God’s Word. Yes, we must lead them to Christ, the Living Water so they can drink deep of His presence. We must also protect and defend them from dangers or we are not doing all our job requires of us. The staff has two ends – a crook to lift sheep to safety and a club to defend them with and drive off predators. Who is looking over your flock?

Moving Evangelicals Beyond Idolatry

Here at Ta Ethne, we do not usually link to other articles or blogs, but today we make an exception. This is an excellent article by R.C. Sproul from Tabletalk magazine, reprinted online for the first time. It is just as relevant now as when it was first published. Please, take a moment to click on the link and read this article.

 

http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/moving-evangelicals-beyond-idolatry

New Resources Available

The newsletter for July will (hopefully) be up this weekend, but the news of our newest resources can’t wait! Dominoes: A Dynamic Commentary on Jude has been released in print. It is available from retailers such as Amazon and it is also available in digital form for the Kindle.  Just as exciting is the news that Dominoes is under production in audio form. When completed, it will become available on iTunes and Audible.com.

On another note, The 180 Project is underway and while the project will take a while to complete, we believe it will be a valuable resource on the subject of biblical repentance. Stay tuned for more information of upcoming events and grab yourself a copy of our commentary on Jude.

Allowing Grief to take Place

I ran across a quote the other day that speaks volumes: “For those who love life, immortality is no consolation in death” – Simone de Beauvoir. We understand, as Christians, that death has lost its ultimate power over us. We know, from Scripture, that our immortal soul, once redeemed by Jesus, will spend eternity with Him. We are even told that it will be reunited with a new body in heaven. Yet, we still grieve over the death of a loved one. This is appropriate on two levels.

First, if the one we have lost was not a believer in Jesus Christ, we grieve because they are truly gone. There is no meeting them again in the afterlife. Their death, for all intents and purposes, is final for us. That relationship we had with them has been sundered forever. Truly, it is appropriate to grieve for them.

Second, even if the person was a believer, even with the hope we have of being reunited with them in heaven, it is appropriate to grieve the loss. For now, the fellowship has been broken, Things are not the same. While we do not grieve as those who have no hope this does not mean we cannot or should not grieve. Death is an intruder, an interloper. It is not without reason the New Testament calls it “the last enemy.”

We grieve over loss because we have been cut off, at least temporarily, from the ones we love. For instance, we may be glad that a child is doing well at college across the country. We expectantly look forward to Christmas break when we will see them again but it doesn’t mute the emptiness of their bedroom we pass everyday. Death magnifies those feelings because we cannot call them on the phone and hear their voice like we can one separated only by distance.

One of the tragedies of our society, as well as today’s church, is not allowing people to adequately grieve. Because we are embarrassed for them or because we have not processed our own grief, we do not allow them to fully grieve and begin the road to healing. When Lazarus died, it wasn’t just Mary and Martha that mourned. Jesus did too. He knew He could resurrect Lazarus. He knew He was going to resurrect Lazarus and yet He still grieved. Knowing that it was okay for our Lord to grieve should be good enough for allowing His children to grieve also. It is a natural response to loss that must be allowed and there is no right way or wrong way to grieve, nor is there a time frame after which it is not allowable. The only restriction placed on grieving in the Bible is that we are not to grieve without hope, as a pagan might.

Modern psychology doesn’t help either. Since Freud’s time it has looked upon grief as a disease, as though it were a sickness like mumps or chicken pox, easily cured with the right combination of drugs or therapies. Only when we accept that for now, until a new heaven and earth are made by God, that suffering and loss are a normal part of our existence and grief is a normal reaction to loss, will we be able to help individuals cope with grief. We will sit with them, cry with them, wonder why with them and listen to their pain without offering stupid, meaningless platitudes. In short, we will experience their life with them and, in doing so, enrich both ours and theirs.

I leave you with this quote:  “We are told that it is perfectly legitimate for believer to suffer grief. Our Lord Himself was a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. Though grief may reach to the root of our souls it must not result in bitterness. Grief is a legitimate emotion, at times even a virtue, but there must be no place in the soul for bitterness.” R.C. Sproul, The Dark Night of the Soul, Tabletalk, March 2008

Zacchaeus and Transformation

Zacchaeus was a wee little man and a wee little man was he
He climbed up in a sycamore tree for the Lord he wanted to see

These opening lines to the children’s song Zacchaeus are, unfortunately, the only thing many Christians know about this man. “Oh yeah, he was short and climbed a tree to see Jesus.” What so many fail to realize is that he is one of the supreme examples in Scripture on the issue of repentance and transformation. His turning from a life of skimming extra money from his job to repaying four times the amount he had stolen is unparalleled. The transformation from a despicable tax collector to a disciple is as complete as it is unexpected.

As we continue work on The 180° Project, Ta Ethne hopes to introduce the reader to the awesome power of God demonstrated in many lives, including Zacchaeus. Repentance is such a crucial component to the gospel that we feel compelled to bring resources that will help the Christian church worldwide both understand it better and proclaim it more. Join in prayer with us about this exciting project and if you have any powerful stories about repentance, please share them with us at taethne@outlook.com