God

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 9

/ taethne

True biblical worship so satisfies our total personality that we don’t have to shop around for man-made substitutes.[1]

Chapter 8

Saul of Tarsus

The story of Saul of Tarsus is one of the most dramatic stories of all time. He explodes onto the scene in the book of the Acts of the Apostles as a terrifying figure. Highly educated and possessing a formidable personality coupled with fanatic devotion, Saul enters the Biblical record as a sworn enemy of Christianity.

Saul is first seen in the Bible standing in approval at the stoning death of Stephen, a deacon in the early church. Following Stephen’s death, Saul is revealed as the instigator in the systematic persecution of the fledgling church. Not content with shattering the church in Jerusalem, Saul obtains permission from the religious leaders to seek out the followers of Jesus wherever they may be, going as far as Damascus, Syria, in zealous pursuit of his targets.

What made Saul so dangerous was his belief system. Saul was a devout Jew, a member of their Sanhedrin and the protégé of the greatest rabbi of that time. Saul was so adamant in his beliefs that he developed a very rigid and intolerant view of any Jewish person who embraced anything other than the Judaism he espoused.

Saul was the most dangerous type of person there is – one who believes, beyond any doubt, that he is acting on God’s behalf and is not subject to any other authority. His mentality was that of the “repent or die” variety. Today, we would probably label Saul as a religious extremist or a terrorist on par with the zealots in the Taliban. Saul acted to keep his religion pure. He wanted it free from the influence of Jesus of Nazareth, who claimed to be the Jewish Messiah, the fulfillment of prophecy.

Saul’s life undergoes a dramatic change one day. He is exposed to the God he claimed to serve and leaves the encounter a changed and humbled man. Interestingly, God used blindness to deliver part of His lesson to Saul, just as He did with Jie Li.

The Bible records the story in Acts, chapter 9. Saul was traveling to Damascus when, suddenly, a bright light enveloped him and a voice from heaven spoke.

“Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?”[2]

Saul realizes that he is in the presence of the supernatural and his question seems to be one of clarification. Is it God, Himself, speaking or an angelic messenger? To his surprise, the voice identifies himself as Jesus. Saul’s shock is evident. He is bent on destroying the followers of Jesus, believing that Jesus was a charlatan, a fake, and now he is faced with overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Jesus speaks from heaven. He is divine.

Blind from the heavenly light, humbled by the voice of Jesus, Saul is led to Damascus a thoroughly confused man. For a number of days he is alone with his thoughts, coming to terms with the difference between what he always believed to be true and truth itself.

During the time Saul is contemplating all that is happening to him, God is busy preparing the next step in drawing Saul to the worship of His Son. God speaks to a Christian believer, Anaias, and tells him to go find Saul and speak to him.

Anaias is naturally afraid. Christians are in hiding because of Saul’s activities and now God is asking him to approach Saul directly. Anaias is hesitant, clearly wondering if God can possibly be serious. He is assured that not only does God want him to visit Saul, but also that God is in the middle of drafting Saul into service for the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Anaias finds Saul, puts his hands on Saul’s head as he prays for him and, just like Jie Li; God answers the prayer and restores sight to Saul. Saul now has a choice to make. For three days, he has prayed to God for clarification, guidance, and wisdom. Anaias challenges Paul with a mini-sermon followed by a question:

“The God of our fathers has chosen you, that you should know His will, and see that Just One (Jesus) and should hear the voice of His mouth. For you shall be His witness unto all men of what you have seen and heard. Why now do you tarry? Arise, be baptized and wash away your sins, calling on the name of the Lord”[3]

Saul is a thoroughly changed man. He does get up and become a Christian. He has accepts the incontrovertible evidence that Jesus is God’s Messiah. He did not just hear a voice and see a bright light. Scripture is clear that Paul beheld the resurrected Christ. He wrestled with this vision for three days and concluded that he had been wrong in his beliefs about Jesus, Christianity, and salvation from God.  For a person of his position, status and temperament, this is a miraculous change. God will use the zeal that characterized Saul and direct it into taking Jesus’ Gospel into the rest of the world. The champion of Jewish orthodoxy would become the champion of the Christian faith. The change is so dramatic that Saul starts using the Greek form of his name, Paul, to symbolize that he is no longer the same individual.

Saul, now Paul, becomes an evangelist, missionary, church planter, and author of the majority of the New Testament. His great intellect, his religious training, and his personality are used by God to spread Christianity throughout Asia Minor and Europe. He truly fulfills Anaias’ prophecy concerning him as Paul will witness before kings, civic leaders, and military commanders across the Mediterranean world. He becomes an unapologetic spokesperson for the Lord Jesus Christ.

The conversion Saul experienced, while dramatic, is not unique. Millions of people throughout the last two millennia have come to determine that Jesus Christ truly is God’s Messiah, the only way to eternal life. No matter how hostile or how angry a person may be towards Jesus, there is always hope for them. God continues to call men and women from all temperaments, all backgrounds, and all personalities through the Holy Spirit to Himself.

There are times when the Holy Spirit gently persuades men and women of the truth about Jesus Christ. There are other times when He uses very dramatic methods. Some people, like Saul, have a great desire to worship God but their idea of how to worship Him is flawed. In His graciousness, God takes measures to correct their thinking, revealing to them the proper way to worship. Other people have no idea of how to worship Him at all, like the Samaritan woman. They have given up in despair of finding a relationship with God. Gently, the Holy Spirit draws them to Jesus Christ, restoring hope to their lives. God knows what each person’s personality is like. He knows the backgrounds they come from. He understands the questions, objections, and longings that fill each of us because He made us to worship Him. He continues to draw us so that we can come into a relationship with Him that enables us to worship Him properly.

Both Jie Li and Saul stand as examples that no one is beyond the reach of God. There is no person who is too bad or who has done too much wrong for God to reach and draw into a personal relationship with Himself. In the words of Saul,

“This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the chief.”[4]

If God can save someone like Saul, a murderous fanatic, or Jie Li, an underworld crime boss, then He can save anyone. This gives everyone of us hope and a reason to celebrate.

[1] Warren Wiersbe, The Integrity Crisis

[2] Acts 9:4

[3] Acts 22:14-16

[4] 1 Timothy 1:15

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 8

/ taethne

All men can be criminals, if tempted; all men can be heroes, if inspired.[1] 

Chapter 7

Jie Li’s Story

Jie Li and I have been friends ever since a visit I made to his country almost a decade ago. Introduced by a mutual friend, we found we had common interests and a bond formed between us. Our families have grown close over the years and he shared his story with me. That story, which I relate here, shows the lengths to which God’s Spirit will go to draw a person to the Lord Jesus.

Jie Li was a bad man. Even in the world of organized crime, where there are many bad people, Jie Li stands out. He rose through the ranks, eventually ending up in the number two position in his crime syndicate, which was among the most powerful in his country. Jie Li tolerated no weaknesses in his men, brooked no argument with his commands. He ruled with an iron fist, both at work and at home.

Jie Li often used physical force to batter his long-suffering wife. When not employing physical abuse, verbal and emotional abuse took center stage. His wife, a very pretty and hard working woman, was an embarrassment to him because she was a Christian. Jie Li believed Christianity was a crutch, not needed by those who had self-confidence, power, and determination. “A religion for superstitious old ladies,” he had once called it. Her refusal to stop attending services on Sundays, despite his increasing punishments, was a constant source of irritation to him. Her being a Christian also brought unwanted scrutiny from the government, as Christianity is viewed as a subversive influence in their country.

Jie Li would come to change his mind about the Christian faith through a dramatic series of occurrences. He awoke one morning and found that he could barely see. Everything appeared as vague, blurry shapes in a dark room. Jie Li went to many specialists but they were unable to diagnose what was happening or how to treat it. Over the next few weeks, his vision continued to deteriorate. His wife urged him to come to her church and have the members pray for his healing, but he refused. Finally, though, Jie Li was desperate enough to give prayer a try. In his profession, showing weakness was dangerous, as many people in his organization would seek to exploit it and usurp him from his position. He knew this first hand, because it was exactly how he had risen through the ranks, himself.

One Sunday he humbled himself enough to accompany his wife to a service at her church. Sure enough, the congregation consisted of mostly old women. Still, they gathered around him, laid hands on his head, and prayed. Jie Li felt embarrassed as well as skeptical but, at this point, he was ready to go anywhere that held out hope for a cure.

The next morning his eyesight was back to normal. As he exclaimed his surprise, his wife was overjoyed. She counseled him, telling him that since God had healed him, he needed to not only thank God, but to serve Him. She told him that God had proven His power and that Jie Li needed to become a Christian.

Jie Li was grateful to her God, but not willing to become a follower of Christ. He did relax his prohibitions against her going to church and started treating her nicer. It was the least he could do.

Months passed by and then, one morning, Jie Li awoke to total darkness. Unlike his earlier eye problems, this time he was completely blind. He panicked, knowing that there was no way to hide this ailment for very long. His wife scolded him, saying that this was God’s punishment for his stubborn refusal to become a follower. “God has withdrawn His blessings,” she said, “Because you did not give your life to Him after He showed Himself to you.”

Jie Li went to all the specialists again. Once again, they had no answers. In desperation, he asked his wife if she would petition her church for another prayer session. She surprised him by refusing. She said that she was worried. “Worried about what,” he asked? She replied that she was worried that if her church prayed and God healed him again, that he would once again refuse to become a Christian. She was afraid that God would then get angry and kill him for his stubbornness. “I would rather have a blind husband than a dead one.”

Jie Li knew from the tone of her voice that his wife was completely serious. After a few more days of agonizing, he told her that if her God healed him that he would become a Christian. It took a while to convince her that he was being completely serious. God’s Spirit had completely broken his hard heart, had shown him how helpless he was to control his own destiny, and held out an invitation to submit to God’s rule in his life. Jie Li was ready to worship a God he had ridiculed for years.

Once again, the church gathered and prayed for Jie Li. Once again, God answered their prayers. Jie Li regained his sight and, true to his word, he became a follower of Christ. His life completely changed. He became a loving husband and a good father. He left organized crime and became an evangelist, giving up a life of prestige and power to travel around the country sharing the life-changing gospel of Jesus Christ.

Jie Li started many churches with his wife serving faithfully alongside him. The number of lives impacted by this couple are too numerous to count. Jie Li’s heart worships God, just as God intended it to worship, thanks to the wonderful grace and mercy of God extended by the Holy Spirit to a man who was as bad as they come. 

There is a man in the Bible who was quite bad, also. Saul was a person who was a very dangerous man. He was not above using physical force, punishments, and other methods to enforce his will. The Holy Spirit drew Saul to God in a similar manner to how He drew Jie Li. You can find the story in the Acts of the Apostles, chapters 8 and 9.

[1] G.K. Chesterton, Heretics

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 7

/ taethne

I have come to know a God whose Son made prodigals the heroes of His stories and the trophies of His ministry.[1]

Chapter 6

The Prodigal’s Story

Jesus told a story of a young man that many people consider one of the greatest short stories of all time. It’s very familiar to many people because it is included in several high school literature books as well as the New Testament. Many of us can identify with one or more of the main characters. If you’re not familiar with this story, please take the time now to read it.

It seems that this ordinary family, a family that, while not rich, certainly was financially comfortable. The father and his two boys worked the family business, which had become profitable. One of the brothers worked diligently, if not happily, doing his duty. The younger brother worked resentfully, thinking it beneath his station in life.

Tiring of the daily toil, he demanded that his father give him the share of the inheritance he would receive after his father’s death. In those days, the custom was that the eldest brother would receive a double share and ownership of the business. Perhaps there was conflict between the siblings – the last part of the story hints at this. Maybe the older brother continually reminded his younger brother that he would one-day work for him. We don’t know what precipitated the demand from the youngest son but it occurred.

The audience that Jesus told the story to was shocked. In their society, this was a grievous affront, a huge sign of disrespect. It was as if the young man had said, “I cannot wait for you to die. Give me my share of your money right now. That’s all I want from you.” His words show not only greed, but also a complete sense of selfishness and disloyalty to his family. He wants to get away from them so bad that he doesn’t even plan to return for his father’s funeral or the reading of his will. He wants what is his and to rid himself of all ties to his family.

Instead of arguing with his son, the father accedes to the demand. He gives his son the money and watches him walk away. He sees his son leave behind his family, his heritage, and his faith. The father longs and hopes that his son will return, but knows it will take a change of heart for that to happen. He keeps watch for that day, praying that God will draw him back one day, someway, somehow.

So many families can relate to this portrayal. Many parents have helplessly watched their child sever ties with them and all for which they stand. They’ve seen their child reject their values and the faith they instilled in them. Many parents hear harsh and rash words spoken by a child storming off, leaving them watching and hoping for their safe return. Like Renaldo going off on his own, leaving behind the faith of his grandmother and her home, this prodigal abandons his father’s house.

The young man decides that since he is out from under the oppressive rule of his father, he’ll live his life as he has always dreamed of living it. Immediately, he goes to the big city, a place where the action is. No more denying his desires; now, he will fulfill his every longing. He finds friends easily; at least, the kind money can buy. He lives a wild life of pleasure and partying. He’s the master of his destiny; he’s charting his own course in life. The story doesn’t tell us how long his life went on like this.  It apparently was long enough so that his family thought he was dead. Eventually, of course, his money runs out. When that occurs, the young man begins to realize just who his true friends are – no one.

He is alone in the city. He has no relatives, no friends, and no income. His prospects for employment are limited by the fact that he doesn’t have a place of his own and by his limited skills. He grew up in a rural setting. He underwent no training in any area where he might find an apprenticeship. His work ethic and lifestyle were not likely to garner anyone taking a chance on hiring him. Added to that, the entire country was in the midst of a famine. For an agrarian society, this would have sent the country into a deep recession, if not an outright depression. There were no jobs available. In desperation, he took the only job for which he is qualified – feeding animals on a farm. It is amazing (and ironic) how taking control of his own life led him to one that was eerily similar to the one he’d left behind.

So many people fail to realize that changing locations in order to start over will not help them if they don’t change too. A person brings their baggage with them to a new location and soon their new life becomes just as miserable as the one they left behind. This young man’s destiny, the course of life he has charted, has just shipwrecked itself on an island of despair.

There is very little food to eat, because of the famine. What livestock are left have become valuable. Animals such as pigs, which eat almost anything, are very valuable, much more so than the hired servant who feeds them. The animals feed first, then the servants. Very soon, he realizes that he has hit rock bottom. He is starving. He has messed his life up beyond his ability to repair the damage. He looks back at his childhood, to the years spent working for his father. The things that he had thought were so terrible now seem so much better than his present circumstances. He also remembers how he left his father. He remembers the words he said, the actions he took. He realizes that in severing all ties with his family he has cut himself off from the one person who might be able to help him. Like Renaldo, he desires to start over again but is not sure how to do it.

Finally, this prodigal decides that he will return home. He knows that he no longer has any claim on his father’s possessions. He realizes that in renouncing his family he has no right to expect them to welcome his return. He does hope that his father will hire him as a servant. At least, he figures, he will not starve to death. He knows how his father treats his hired hands, their wages, and their living conditions. It’s far better than where he finds himself at present.  Steeling his resolve, he sets out for home.

The Scriptures tell us that while the prodigal was still a long way off, his father spied him trudging down the road. The father’s love for his son hasn’t diminished. Though his son’s actions deeply hurt him, his love never wavered. He runs to his son, wraps his arms around him and kisses him.

The prodigal is deeply ashamed of himself. He is ashamed of all he has done. In humility, he tells his father, “I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.”[2] His father, though, gives him a new change of clothes, a ring identifying him as a member of the family and orders a feast prepared. He is restoring his son to the family.

The prodigal will have to live with the consequences of his actions. He cannot erase the past. He no longer has a share of the inheritance. What he has, though, is a restored relationship with his father.

The prodigal and Renaldo share some things. Both of them left a good, stable home. Both Renaldo and the prodigal wanted to experience all that life had to offer, free of restraints. Both of them found that their lives did not turn out the way that they had planned. The prodigal found he was stranded in another country, starving and bankrupt. Renaldo found himself with two failed marriages and no ability to keep a steady job. Both of them realized they messed up their lives and couldn’t do anything to extricate them from where they were.

The Holy Spirit sometimes must completely break a person before they will acknowledge that they need help. This was the case with Renaldo and the prodigal. The Holy Spirit arranged circumstances in both lives to draw them into a relationship. The Holy Spirit acts and the prodigal is restored to his father; Renaldo, to God the Father.

Lance also had to be broken by the Holy Spirit. His heart, who felt no regret for using and taking advantage of people, had to be changed. When Lance repented and asked for forgiveness, he found it and his relationship with both God and the church restored.

The Spirit continues to use circumstances to draw people’s hearts to worship God. It would be a shame if He has to go to the lengths with you as He did with the prodigal. It is comforting, though, to know that He will go that far to bring you into a relationship with God the Father. How far away, from God, are you right now? How out of control is your life? Is it beyond your ability to fix? What is keeping you from turning your life over to God right now by receiving Jesus Christ as your Savior?

[1] Philip Yancy, What Good is God?: In Search of a Faith That Matters

[2] Luke 15:21

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 6

/ taethne

“Dear God, 
I am so afraid to open my clenched fists! 
Who will I be when I have nothing left to hold on to? 
Who will I be when I stand before you with empty hands? 
Please help me to gradually open my hands 
and to discover that I am not what I own, 
but what you want to give me.”[1]

Chapter 5

Renaldo and Lance’s Stories

            Renaldo rode his bicycle to work, head down against the brisk, chill wind. He mentally beat himself up for driving with a suspended license the week before. It certainly was stupid, but it beat biking to work in the winter. If only he had paid more attention to the cop who was behind him, maybe he wouldn’t be freezing this morning.

            Renaldo was very good at his construction job, which was the only reason his boss kept him on. He had numerous run-ins with the law; DUI’s, fights in bars, drunk and disorderly conduct, etc. When sober, Renaldo did great work; his skills at carpentry and mason work were second-to-none. When he drank, it was a different story.

            Twice married, he was involved in an on-again, off-again relationship with a girl he had dated back in high school, twenty years earlier. The relationship was off now and instead of living at her house, Renaldo had only a little camper that he pulled with his pick-up. 

While he loved construction work, most places in town wouldn’t employ him anymore. Too many work days missed because he was in jail for something or other (most times he couldn’t remember what he was charged with) too many fights with co-workers after hours;  all of these things limited the number of companies which were willing to hire him. His current employer used him on only the most difficult jobs, on a contract basis.

Renaldo reflected on his life as he rode. He wondered how it had turned out this way. He remembered his grandmother; she had passed away last year and he still missed her, terribly. She had raised him from the age of four until he had dropped out of high school and married at sixteen.

“If ever there was a saint,” he mused, “It was grandmother.” She had made sure to take him with her to church and Sunday School every week. He remembered how he had chafed as a teenager, sitting on those hard wood benches as the preacher droned on and on in a monotone voice. Something must have stuck with him, though. He could still remember songs from Sunday School, making crafts at the summer Bible School and somewhere in his camper was the little New Testament he received as a prize for memorizing Scripture verses.

He thought of his grandmother’s last few days. He sat in her room at the nursing home for a week straight, afraid that if he left even for a little while that she would die before he returned. He also thought of the young pastor, about his age, which had spent almost as much time with her as he had. It was obvious that he was close to her as well. Renaldo remembered his grandmother’s last night. Weakly, but distinctly, he heard her say the words to her favorite hymn repeatedly.

He also remembered that he had promised her that he would go back to church. It was time, he resolved, to keep his promise. He would go to his grandmother’s church to honor her memory. Renaldo hoped it would not be as boring as he remembered.

The next Sunday Renaldo showed up for the morning service. He wore his best clothes – jeans that were not too faded and a shirt he had picked up at the Salvation Army thrift store. He felt out of place at first, but then he saw many older people whom he remembered as his grandmother’s friends. He even saw his old Sunday School teacher, who not only remembered him but also welcomed him warmly and invited him to sit next to her.

The thing that struck him the most about the service was the sermon. The pastor was not boring. In fact, he talked about the struggles various people encountered in life and how the Bible talked about Jesus’ promise to be with his followers through their struggles. He was surprised to hear this, since he thought Christians didn’t have (or weren’t supposed to have) problems.

After the service, the pastor asked him how he was doing and expressed how much he missed Renaldo’s grandmother. Before he realized it, Renaldo accepted an invitation to dinner with the pastor’s family later in the week. “Great,” he thought, “He will badger me about Jesus and stuff.” Still, a promise was a promise and Renaldo did his best to keep his promises.

At dinner that Thursday night, Renaldo was surprised to find he was having fun. The pastor’s wife had fixed a simple meal but to Renaldo it tasted better than what he usually heated up on his camp stove. It turned out that the family played board games at suppertime and Renaldo was invited to play with them. After supper, the kids went off to do their chores while the pastor and Renaldo sat on the porch with coffee.

“Here it comes,” he thought, “Now is the time for the Jesus speech.” Instead, the pastor shared his memories of his grandmother and Renaldo responded with his own. As the evening ended, the pastor invited Roberto to drop by anytime he needed to talk, wanted a home-cooked meal or just to hang out. As they walked to the door, the pastor told Renaldo that his grandmother had prayed for him every day. “Every day she prayed you would come back to church. I believe she is very happy to see you come back as she watches from heaven.”

Renaldo lay in his camper that night and decided that he’d go back to church on Sunday. The people were nice, no one looked down on him and he really liked how the pastor’s family treated him. If that is how Christians acted, maybe becoming one wasn’t such a bad thing after all. He would have to give it some serious thought.

As the months went by, Renaldo continued to attend the services at the church. Various members of the church hired him to do construction work on the side, which really helped him to financially get ahead a little bit. He volunteered to help with the sound system, as it allowed him to attend services but keep his distance by being sequestered in the sound room. A church leader even asked him to participate in church activities, to help chaperone some teenage boys on a trip. At first, he protested, saying he wouldn’t be a good role model because of the troubles in his past. They told him that was exactly what would make a good chaperone. With him on guard, none of the kids would be able to get by with anything because he already knew all the tricks. Little by little, Renaldo was drawn into the life of the church.

Slowly, Renaldo came to realize that more than anything, he wanted a life like the people in the church, and one like his grandmother had lived. One Sunday morning he surprised himself by walking up to the pastor and saying, “I am ready to stop running my life my way. All I do is mess it up. I want Jesus to take control of it.”

Renaldo had finally found what he had been searching for in his life. God had drawn Renaldo and his life would never be the same. I know this, because I was the young pastor that ministered to Renaldo.

While he still has a way to go in dealing with the consequences of his past actions, Renaldo does not have to face them alone anymore. The Holy Spirit continues to draw Renaldo into a closer relationship with God, who cares about him, and a closer relationship with a church family who is willing to help.

▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪

Lance was a long-time member of our church. He had been there years prior to my becoming pastor, though much about him remained a mystery. Lance would attend for a few weeks and then disappear for months at a time. When he showed back up, he was always living at a different address and recently employed at either a menial job or unemployed.

For years, the church had been generous to Lance. Both corporately and individually, the church members helped him financially, found jobs for him and even bought him furniture and food. He was always appreciative and grateful. Lance promised each time to repay those who had helped him, but no one ever expected him to. It seemed that he was just one of those people, who tried hard, but could never get ahead. Everyone liked him, but no one really knew anything about Lance. He kept his personal life private, even though many people made the effort to get to know him better.

One fall, Lance attended a series of revival services at church. The Holy Spirit did a mighty work on him that evening. Lance stood in the back, tears running down his face during the closing song. Before the service could end, he came to the front of the sanctuary and asked if he could address the church for a few minutes. The story he shared with us that night stunned everyone in the building.

Lance confessed to the church that he had been scamming them for years. He was actually pretty well off, financially. The reason for his disappearances for weeks at a time was that he went to Alaska and Canada to work. Sometimes, he would work on fishing vessels, other times in the oil fields. He confessed that he made very good money. In between jobs, he would come back home and rent a place to live by the week. While he didn’t need money, he said that it was just so easy to ask the church for help, knowing that they would oblige. The money and food he kept, furniture and other clothes he sold for even more money.

Lance went on to say that until that night, he had never felt a minute of regret for taking advantage of the church’s generosity. He went on to say that he was sorry, that God’s Spirit had convicted him of his thieving and lying, and that he had asked forgiveness from God. Now, he was wondering, could the church forgive him?

There was a silence across the congregation for almost a full minute as his words sunk in. One could see people struggling to process what they had just heard. Finally, hemmed in by people on both sides of his seat, Doug rose up. He had given Lance a lot of money over the years.  Not waiting for those around him to let him out of the row, Doug climbed over the pews and made his way forward. Lance visibly flinched, expecting the worse. Instead, he found the best.

Grabbing him in a hug, Doug publically forgave him. He rejoiced that God had reached Lance’s heart and changed it. The rest of the church was not far behind. Lance experienced the cleansing power of forgiveness that night. He was welcomed into the fellowship of his church family again. His heart became free to worship God, as the bonds of his sinful actions were broken. He was drawn back to God by the convicting power of the Holy Spirit, much like the famous story of the Prodigal Son, found in Luke, chapter 15.

[1] Henry Nouwen, The Only Necessary Thing: Living a Praying Life

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 5

/ taethne

The next installment from the book A Heart Hungry To Worship, available on Amazon

  “Do you understand what you are reading?” Philip asked the Ethiopian. “How can I?” he said, “unless someone explains it to me?”[1]          

Chapter 4

The Ethiopian Eunuch

            Of all the people whose stories the holy pages of Scripture record, the Ethiopian eunuch stands out as one of the most fascinating. We find clues to who he was in Scripture, though we do not find his actual name recorded. He was from what is present day Sudan.  He was what we would term the Minister of Finance or Secretary of the Treasury for his country: a person, therefore, of power and prestige in the ancient kingdom of Meroe (also called Cush). While the Merovians viewed their king as an incarnation of the sun, the position was largely ceremonial. Considered too holy as a Child of the Sun to be involved in secular affairs, the queen mothers, known by the title, “the Candace,” held the real power in the kingdom.

            Eunuchs were often slaves employed to keep guard over the royal harem. They became so trustworthy and loyal in that role that it became customary to place them over the treasury. After all, if a person could be trusted with the king’s wives then he could be trusted with the king’s money; at least, that is what the Merovians believed. In fact, the term eunuch would become a synonym for “treasurer” in many countries.

            This particular eunuch was returning from a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. Apparently, he had become attracted to Judaism and was seeking further answers. He could not become a full proselyte (convert) to that religion because the Old Testament forbids castrated people from entering the Temple. Now, the passage of Scripture found in Acts 8 tells us that this eunuch had gone all the way from his country in Africa to Jerusalem, in the Middle East, to worship. Unfortunately, for him, he would experience great disappointment when he arrived.

            We don’t know how this man even obtained a copy of the Hebrew Scriptures or how he started considering Judaism as a belief system. It might have been from a trade delegation to his country from Israel or friendship with Jews from the Diaspora that settled in Meroe. However he received the Hebrew Scriptures, whatever the means of his awareness of the Hebrew God, this man was drawn by a desire to worship Him.

            Understand that a man like this, a man who held an important post in his government, would weigh very heavily a decision to change religious loyalties. The people of his nation believed their king to be a god, a most holy person. For the Minister of Finance to show allegiance to another god would have brought suspicion of treason and sedition. For the eunuch, though, the desire to find and worship the Hebrew God was overwhelming. God’s Spirit was drawing him and thus he is led to plan a trip to Jerusalem, to seek this God in His Temple.  

            Upon his arrival at the Temple, though, he found that he could only enter the outer courtyard, the Court of the Gentiles. Not just because he was non-Jewish, an Ethiopian, but also because he had been castrated. While he could interact with people on the area considered non-holy ground, he could not enter the inner areas, the Temple proper.

            He wanted to worship God, was being drawn to worship God, but his worship was incomplete. There existed a barrier, erected to keep people like him away. He thought that by going to a certain location, he would find answers, but the questions remained. Frustrated, he began the journey home where he fortuitously meets Philip.

            The Holy Spirit has instructed Philip to make contact with the Ethiopian and he does so. Running alongside the chariot, he hears the eunuch reading from Isaiah. In those days, it was customary to read aloud, not silently when one read to their self. Philip asks him a simple question: “Do you understand what you are reading?” The English translation does not do justice to the original Greek wording. Philip’s question really asks the eunuch if what he is reading has any meaning for him, if what he is reading makes any sense.

            The response is so telling! It is a response of frustration, discouragement and disappointment. “How can I, unless someone explains it to me?” Despite his apparent regalia and retinue, no one in Jerusalem had taken the time to answer his questions. No one helped quench his thirst for the knowledge of the One True God. He had a copy of the Scriptures, but could not understand what the words meant. He could read them, he was an educated man fluent in languages, but the meaning, the import, and the supernatural impact of the words eluded him.

            There is a reason why the Bible says that only those who are spiritual can understand spiritual things.[2] Until a person comes to submit their life to the Lord Jesus, the Bible depicts them as spiritually blind, unable to see or comprehend spiritual truths.[3] They need the Holy Spirit to open their spiritual eyes and illuminate their minds. Often, the Spirit uses believers, like Philip, in that process.

            The Ethiopian invites Philip up into his chariot and asks him a question about the passage he is reading. “Who is the prophet referring to?” Without being able to identify the subject talked about, a person cannot make a proper interpretation. Philip begins introducing the Ethiopian to Jesus through this passage. The Book of Isaiah was tailor-made for a person like this Ethiopian. It’s in Isaiah that many prophecies of Jesus’ birth and reign are found.[4] It’s in Isaiah where one finds promises to eunuchs of their inclusion in God’s Holy Temple[5] alongside other worshippers of God. Isaiah described God Himself, high and lifted up, as having compassion on people who have wandered away from the truth; who are like sheep.[6]

Philip begins with the passage the Ethiopian is wrestling with and uses it as a springboard to tell the story of Jesus, God’s Messiah. As Philip expounds the meaning of what the Ethiopian was reading God’s Spirit illuminates his mind. Now, he realizes how a person is to worship God. Now, he realizes that it’s not at a Temple made by human hands but through faith in Jesus Christ that a person comes to approach God. As they pass by some water, he interrupts Philip to ask, “Is there anything that hinders me from being baptized right now?” He understands; he wants to identify with Jesus Christ and he desires to proclaim his newfound faith.

            Water baptism was quite common in those days. In Judaism, it stood as a symbol for a Gentile’s repentance and conversion to Israel’s religion. In Christianity, it stands for each person’s repentance and as a symbol of his or her submission to Christ’s Lordship.

            Philip baptizes the Ethiopian, which shows us an important picture. Philip, an olive skinned man, baptizes the Ethiopian, a black man, into the fellowship of the church. Philip, a former adherent to Judaism, and the Ethiopian, a former adherent to the religion of Meroe, become equal in standing before Christ. In Christ, racial barriers, national barriers, cultural barriers fall. Each person finds themselves equal at the foot of the Cross.

            As Dinah found herself struggling with the meaning of Scripture so did the Ethiopian eunuch. Both of them left the unsatisfying religion of their youth to find true answers in a relationship with Jesus Christ. The Holy Spirit used believers to explain Scripture to them as He illuminated their minds and spiritually enlightened them. He continues to do so today. He continues to reach out and draw people into the knowledge of the truth. What a wonderful God we have, one who is willing and able to reach out to His creation.

[1] Acts 8:30-31

[2] 1 Corinthians 2:13-16

[3] 2 Corinthians 4:3-4

[4] Isaiah 7:14, 11:1-16

[5] Isaiah 56:3-8

[6] Isaiah 6:1-4, 53:6

A Heart Hungry To Worship part 4

/ taethne

The next chapter from the book A Heart Hungry To Worship (available on Amazon) – Dinah’s Story

Before there can be fullness there must
be emptiness.  Before God can fill us with Himself, we must first be emptied of ourselves.[1]

Chapter 3

Dinah’s Story

            The rapping sound on the door startled me. It was late in the evening and I wasn’t expecting company. I opened the door to find Dinah standing there, looking angry and confused. She asked if she could come in and ask some questions, so I invited her inside and we sat down in the living room. Dinah told me she just left a meeting with her church leaders, asking them to answer a couple of questions that I had given to her a couple of weeks earlier. She informed me that not only was she dissatisfied with the answers they gave her, but also that one question was answered with, “Well, technically, he is correct.”

            Dinah was facing a crossroads of faith. On one side was a belief system she had grown up with, embraced and taught to others that was now being challenged. On the other side were answers from Scripture that stood at odds with what she’d always believed. To change her mind meant admitting that she was wrong and that she had taught her family and other people wrong beliefs as well. This is why she showed up at my door, angry and confused.

            Dinah and I met some months earlier when she showed up at our church. Her daughter, in the military at the time, had joined a church affiliated with our denomination. Dinah took this as a personal affront, an abandonment of beliefs held by their family for generations. She came to our church seeking to know what we believed and how our beliefs differed from hers in the hopes of confronting her daughter and bringing her back to their denomination.

            What Dinah found was her own beliefs being confronted. I answered her questions about our beliefs on varying topics in return for her telling me what her church taught about them. I then suggested we take our church’s official statements of belief and compare them to Scripture and to each other. Where we found discrepancies, I asked her to go back to her leaders and seek understanding of why they believed as they did.

            For weeks, we met, going through doctrine after doctrine. Slowly, she came to an understanding that many of the beliefs she held did not match up to the clear teaching of the Bible. During one session with her leaders, Dinah told me that they said to her that their traditions held the same weight as Scripture. We then looked at verses in the Bible that addressed that issue as well. Dinah began to get frustrated with her leaders as answer after answer came back to “tradition” and not because their belief system was undergirded by God’s Word.

            Finally, there came the night when she appeared at my door. We both knew what it was costing her that night. Pride warred with truth. One of the big hurdles for her to overcome was the fact that by admitting the beliefs she had held for years were wrong, she was also admitting she had taught those wrong beliefs to her family and many others through her work for her denomination. The guilt she was feeling warred with her pride. I silently prayed that the Holy Spirit would cause her to understand the truth of Jesus’ statement, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”[2]

Sensing that she was close to making a major decision, I asked her to meet with me the following evening and bring her husband, Ted. A quiet man, Ted would sometimes accompany Dinah when we talked about beliefs and I wanted him to be there with her. While Ted had not participated in our discussions very often, I surmised from the comments that he did interject that he was also wrestling with the same doubts.

            The next evening, I sat down with the two of them and asked a simple, yet direct question. “Now that we have exhausted all your questions about doctrines and beliefs, what is keeping you from entering into a personal relationship with Jesus?” They replied, “Nothing.”

Dinah and Ted both gave their lives over to the Savior that night.

Dinah had read the Bible many times in her life. She never understood the meaning of the words she read until the Holy Spirit started illuminating them. She knew that the Bible contained truths. Her problem, like so many other people’s problem, was that she looked to human tradition instead of Scripture alone. When confronted with clear differences between the two, she realized she had a choice to make. Would she hold to her tradition out of stubborn pride, or would she yield to the teachings of God’s Word?

Dinah and Ted studied the Bible diligently from that night on. They began a spiritual journey that led both of them, in their sixties, to move to another community and help start a new church. Their hearts responded to God’s Word and they began to worship the Creator the way that He intended for them to worship Him. All they needed was for someone to explain to them the meaning of the Scriptures they were reading.

The Bible contains the story of a man who knew God’s Word held answers for his life, but who needed someone to explain their meaning to him. It is the story of the Ethiopian in the Book of Acts.

[1] A.W. Tozer, How to be Filled With the Spirit

[2] John 8:32

A Heart Hungry To Worship part 3

/ taethne

We continue with the next chapter from the book A Heart Hungry to Worship (available on Amazon).

Without worship, we go away miserable.[1]

Chapter 2

The Samaritan Woman

            The interaction between Jesus and the woman at the well in the New Testament book of John, chapter 4, is amazing. Its relevance to our modern world is worth looking at in detail. This woman is one who is desperately longing to worship God but she is confused as to what worshipping Him should be. The result is that she has given up trying to find God. Let us look at this encounter so we can discover how to relate to people searching for hope and truth in God.  

What a story! It is the story of a miserable woman going through the motions of an ordinary day. She was a failure at relationships – not so much in finding them, but at keeping them. She has been married and divorced five times, and is now with man number six. This shows us that having relationships is important to her. She does not want to be alone, and yet, we see that her choices in life have left her very lonely, indeed.

            She does not come to the well in the cool of the morning with the other women. I am sure that she cannot stand to hear the snide remarks and malicious gossip the other women directed at her. She would rather draw water up from a one hundred foot plus well by herself than be subjected to humiliation.

            Outcast, rejected in love, and with her self-esteem shot, she arrives at noon to retrieve her water. She is not alone like she had hoped. A stranger is there; worse, a Jewish one. Jews hated Samaritans. They called them half-breeds, false worshippers, and a people accursed by God. They charged the Samaritans with changing the sacred writings of Moses, intermarrying with pagans and setting up a rival place of worship. All true charges, by the way.

            This Jewish man politely asks her for a drink. Now she is wary. The only time men are polite to her are for illicit favors. “What does He really want from me? She decides to cut right to the chase. “Why are you, a Jew, asking anything from me?”

            Notice the reply of Jesus. It is really somewhat weird, especially to her. “If you only knew who I was you’d be asking me for living water.”

            She is not impressed with whoever this man, this Jew, thinks he is. Therefore, she decides to get rid of him by insulting him. She claims kinship with Jesus by appealing to “our father” Jacob. No Jew would stand for that. No Jew would even begin to admit they had a common ancestor, much less a revered one, with a Samaritan. Jesus should have stomped off in a huff leaving her alone, but he does not.

            Instead of leaving, he starts speaking gently to her and as he speaks, the Holy Spirit starts drawing her. As Jesus explains that his living water is eternal life, the Spirit illuminates her understanding. Her spiritual blindness begins to lift. Her yearning for eternal life explodes.

“Eternal life for me, God’s eternal love is for me? Is it really possible?”

            His words connect. She is so thirsty for real love. She is so hungry for a real relationship. Could God care for one like her? One who failed so many times? One who has failed so often? Eternal life, for her, did she hear that correctly?

            Oh, listen to her in verse 15. “Sir, give me this water, this eternal life, so I’ll never be thirsty again!”

            Do you hear the longing in her voice? She was just going through an ordinary day, one filled with the same misery and drudgery of countless days before and now hope is being offered to her. The hope of a lasting relationship with her Creator has been offered to her. Hope is a powerful thing. She has been given a hope that her future will be better than her past failures. In fact, hope in Jesus operates as both the evidence and proof that her sins are forgiven and her past no longer defines her. Nevertheless, she still needs to deal with one big issue in her life; is she willing to give up everything to receive this eternal life, this living water? How desperate is she?

            Jesus, knowing all about her, asks her a sharp, pointed request. “Go, get your husband, and come back.” The woman then reasons to herself, “Get my husband? I don’t have a husband. I’ve had five but none now. Why does he want to speak to him, anyway? I want to talk about eternal life, not about the part of me that I’ve failed at the most. Why is he changing the subject?”

            Jesus knew that this woman had been trusting in men, in relationships, for her security. He had to get her to admit that she was looking for security in the wrong places. She has a choice. She can change the painful subject he has brought up. She can also avoid it altogether and walk off. She could lie or she could tell the truth. The Holy Spirit continues to call her, to work on her heart. To her own surprise, she blurts out the truth to this stranger, “I have no husband.”

            Jesus reveals to her that he already knew the truth. He already knew her lifestyle and her life history. He knew all that and still offered her eternal life. Do you see how powerful that is? So many people think they have lived such a terrible life, that they have made too many wrong choices for God to desire a relationship with them. Nothing could be further from the truth. God, who knows and sees everything, offers eternal life, living water, to every person. Despite what we do, He still offers it to us.

            Now she is excited! He knew all that and still offered her this gift! He must be God’s prophet. What a wonderful day!  This is why a Jewish man is talking with her, a Samaritan woman. He must be on a mission from God with a message for their town. How fortunate for her that she was able to meet with him, privately.

            Now many people look at her next statement and assume that she is trying to change the subject. This is not the case. She desperately wants eternal life. She craves it. Her heart is hungry to worship God because it is responding to the work of the Spirit who is bringing it to life! Let me paraphrase her response.

            “You are God’s prophet! I see this now. You can tell me where to find God. You just said as much. Where do I go? To which group do I need to belong? What holy place is correct? What ritual must I perform? Please, sir, where do I go to find God? How do I get this eternal life?”

            Can you hear the desperation in her voice, the hope against hope springing up inside of her that she might possibly find a relationship with God after all these years? Do you hear it in the voices of those with whom you interact? People desperately want to believe that they can have a relationship with God but they’ve lost hope of actually finding one. Especially, when God’s people have been quick to judge and cast off as unclean those who have made major mistakes in life. If you listen closely, you can hear her words echoing through their voices.

            “Could it be true that I could be offered eternal life? With my lifestyle, my life history, are you seriously telling me that God is calling to me, wanting a personal relationship with me?”  Yes, I am; In fact, God loves you so much that He sent His only Son for you.

            “Where would I go to find this? To what church do I have to belong? What rituals do I have to perform? With all the different groups claiming to be the way to God, how will I ever determine the truth? Please, sir, where do I go to find God?”

            Jesus is so gentle with her. “Lady, the place is not important. God can be found anywhere. If you worship in spirit and in truth, the physical location is not important. The relationship with Him is important. He can be found right now, right here, through Me.”

            She is confused. She still does not quite grasp what he is saying to her. Hear the wistfulness in her voice as she makes the next statement.

            “When the Messiah, God’s Anointed One, comes, He will clear up the confusion. He will explain things to us. How I wish He were here.”

            Jesus says to her, “I am He.” The last blinders fall from her spiritual eyes. She sees and understands. She accepts what He says. How do we know this? She goes and gathers her neighbors to come and hear Him. Verse 41 says, many more believed. Many more than just this woman comes to believe in Jesus Christ and worship Him. Listen to their words in verse 42 – “We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world.”

 He is not just a teacher but also a Savior. He is more than just a prophet; He is a Savior. He is more than just a Jewish Messiah; He is the one and only Savior of the world.

            Notice in the story how she gets a crowd to come to Jesus. She goes and tells the townspeople, “come see a man who has told me everything I have ever done.” The men came to see if Jesus knew they had been involved with her sexually. The women came to hear if their husbands were among the adulterers named. The servants came to hear scandal and gossip. They whole town comes to hear Jesus speak; they are so impressed that they ask Him to stay for two days. It is after spending time with Jesus that the Bible says that many of them believed.

            Their hearts were hungry for worship because the Holy Spirit was already working in them, drawing them to Himself. There are people in every town of every country whose hearts are hungry for worship because the Spirit is calling them. They long to worship God, they long to enter into a personal relationship with Him but they simply do not know where to start. That is our job. Those of us who are in a relationship with God are the ones qualified to explain to those desiring a relationship with God how they can have a relationship with Him through Jesus Christ.

            We need to be quite clear that this relationship does not depend on which church or to which denomination one belongs. We need to be quite clear that it doesn’t depend on a ritual or one’s moral, ethical or religious performance. Jesus explained that a relationship with God is based on worshipping in spirit and in truth.  Before we explore that statement in more detail, I want to introduce you to Dinah.

[1] A.W.Tozer, Worship: The Missing Jewel of the Evangelical Church

A Heart Hungry To Worship Part 2

/ taethne

Years ago I published a book, A Heart Hungry to Worship, (available on Amazon) that focused on relating the stories of Biblical characters to people I have encountered in my ministry. For 2024 I would like to upload a chapter at a time to encourage people. Below is the first chapter from the book. Yet, if he would, man cannot live all to this world. If not religious, he will be superstitious. If he worships not the true God, he will have his idols.[1]

Chapter 1

Sheila and Maggie’s Stories

            Sheila is a creative, vibrant woman in her mid-twenties who is the new owner of her own art gallery. Response in the first few months has been better than expected, but her expectations were not high to begin with.

Sheila is grateful for a chance to start her life over, given that she almost ruined it during her high school years. Known as a wild party girl, Sheila led a life filled with alcohol, drugs and numerous boyfriends. Finding herself pregnant after graduation shocked her. She got an abortion before anyone knew she was pregnant. To her surprise, the experience was not as easy or painless as she believed it would be. The scarring caused by the procedure rendered her incapable of bearing children; nightmares still haunt her sleep two or three times each week.

Her parents are distant. Her mother is an alcoholic, wrapped up in her own miseries, while her father, disgusted by her behavior in high school, has pretty much disowned her. Sheila knows her lifestyle has to change, but the pull of friends who still view her as the party girl is strong. So is facing the continual scrutiny and gossip in her small town.

For the first time in her life, Sheila is contemplating spiritual things. She tried reading an old family Bible a few times, but she could not understand the Victorian-era English. Twice she even tried attending church. Since she had no idea what any of them believed, she tried the large church downtown first. Sheila reasoned that she would be anonymous in a large crowd.

She came away disappointed. She felt as if she had stepped into a cold marble vault. Everything was very solemn and the service was spoken in a foreign language. She did not know when to stand, sit, or when to respond. She could see that for many people it was a meaningful experience, but for her it was just confusing.

The next week she chose a nearby church that had a more modern feel about it. The atmosphere in this church was different: vibrant and alive. While the songs were unfamiliar, at least they were upbeat and the people singing them seemed happy. Then, unexpectedly, multiple people started talking loudly in what sounded to her like multiple languages.  When it reached a crescendo, Sheila was out the door, shaken and confused. Maybe a person had to learn another language to be a Christian. If that was the case, she was out of luck. The one semester of French she took in high school had been a spectacular failure.

It will be awhile before Sheila ventures to church again. Maybe, if she could go with someone who could explain what was going on, she would try. Which church would accept someone with her past, though? The people at the churches she visited already looked like they had their lives together.

Sheila feels guilty about her abortion and believes God will punish her for it. While she longs to know Him, she is deathly afraid of meeting Him because of her past actions. She has reached the point where something has to change in her life. She wonders, “Is there any hope for a person like me? Is there any way to bury the demons from my past that haunt me?”

Sheila has one last straw to which she is clinging. She has a Christian friend that has been supportive and willing to listen to her pour out her heart during late night phone calls. She has kept him at a distance because of her fear of being too vulnerable. He has offered to take her to his church sometime or even hold a Bible study with her.

Maybe, just maybe, Sheila thinks, she will be able to find answers to her questions. While she is not yet ready to visit another church, she is willing to study the Bible with someone who knows and accepts her as a person. Perhaps there is hope for someone like her. There needs to be because she does not think she can face fifty more years like her first twenty-five.

Maggie has just turned forty. A hard working single mother, Maggie has struggled with finding meaningful relationships all of her life. Maggie experienced sexual abuse, as did her older sister, by a distant relative. As is all too often in small communities, where just about everyone is somehow related, very few believed her story and those who did wanted this dirty secret covered up so as not to bring scandal or embarrassment to the family.

            Maggie married young and had two children with a man who turned out to have a problem with drugs. Not wanting to have her children raised around a drug addict, it was not long before she filed for divorce.  After their divorce, she married again, this time to a person who promised her the world but who crushed her spirit by cheating on her. After moving, with three children, to a new town in order to start over, she attempted marriage number three. This marriage started fine but quickly soured due to the suspicious and jealous nature of her husband. Verbal and emotional abuse took its toll and this marriage collapsed after only a few years.

            Maggie vowed not to marry again. She threw herself into her work and her children’s lives. After the oldest two graduated high school, she began to think about herself. She felt she deserved love but was scared and hesitant to make herself vulnerable again.

When an old boyfriend from high school came back into her life, she wondered if he was the love she had been looking for all along.

            The first month flew by. So much for taking it slow, she was falling head over heels in love. He seemed to care about her and her children. He was attentive and caring. Then he got drunk and physically abusive one night and her world shattered, again. “Never again!” she vowed, would she allow herself to open up to anyone who would hurt her. Deep down, though, Maggie still desired to be loved and to love back. Her fear is that her desire for love will open herself up to hurt again.

            Maggie has one philosophy that she believes in: “Everything happens for a reason.” She just cannot grasp the reason behind what has happened to her. “Why was I abused?” ” Why has every marriage failed?” “Why have all my relationships fallen apart when I try so hard?” “When will I ever find love?”

            Maggie thinks of God from time to time. She believes in God, at least the little she has heard about Him. She has only been to church a few times in her life, mostly for funerals. What she believes about God is that He is a person worth knowing, someone who is perfect and holy and who expects His followers to be that way. She doesn’t feel she would qualify to be a follower because of her past failures. She doesn’t believe that God would want anything to do with her. Maggie lives without hope and truly believes she will spend life after death in hell; “After all,” she thinks, “It cannot be much worse than the life I am living now.”

            Deep down she would like a relationship she can count on, but she is so terrified of being disappointed again that she is not even willing to give God a chance to initiate one with her.

            Maggie and Sheila’s stories are not unique. In fact, their stories are of people I know and work with who have had similar life experiences. I count them as my friends but I have yet to penetrate the shields they have erected around their lives.

            I long to offer them the hope they so desperately need but are afraid to accept. We talk often, especially when crisis happens in their life. They know they need help beyond that which humans can offer, but they are not ready to ask God. Their reasoning is simple: “God is my only hope and if He lets me down, I truly have nothing and no one left.”

            The Bible contains the story of a person just like Maggie and Sheila. With a past that haunts her, this woman finds herself constantly entering one failed relationship after another. A woman who is desperate to find love, who wants to believe that God can love her, but who struggles to make sense of the world she finds herself in. Let us look at her story.

[1] Theodore Parker, The Transient and the Permanent

A Heart Hungry To Worship

/ taethne

Years ago I published a book, A Heart Hungry to Worship, (available on Amazon) that focused on relating the stories of Biblical characters to people I have encountered in my ministry. For 2024 I would like to upload a chapter at a time to encourage people. Below is the introduction from the book.

 It is in the process of being worshipped that God communicates His presence to men.[1]

Introduction

            God created each of us with an innate desire to worship Him. You would think, then, that it should come naturally to us. Yet millions have no knowledge of who God is, so worshipping Him is impossible. Millions more are confused as to how to find Him or how to approach Him when He is found. Still others are convinced that even if they met God He would not accept worship from them. They feel so unworthy they cannot believe He would want any kind of relationship with them.

You will meet some of these people in this book. These are people like you and I, struggling to make sense of this world, convinced there is something more than what we are experiencing. People hoping against hope that someday they will have a relationship with a God they desperately want to love them, a God they crave to worship. People like Maggie, Sheila, Dinah and Renaldo who could be your neighbor, co-worker or cousin; people who long for the closeness that salvation by grace brings.

            One of the neat things about the Bible is that it contains true stories of people like this – like us! People who are desperately seeking to be found by God but do not know where to start. They are people like the Ethiopian eunuch in the book of Acts or the Samaritan woman in John’s gospel. They are people who have a desire to worship God but are confused how that worship comes about.

            I tell their stories in the pages ahead. Stories about those who God is drawing into a relationship they desire but are scared to enter. Those who the Holy Spirit has begun drawing but have not quite arrived. Those whose hearts are hungry to worship the One True Living God.

[1] C.S. Lewis, Reflections on the Psalms

Light In The Darkness

/ taethne

I first wrote this 3 years ago. With all that has happened in our world since then, I felt it appropriate to repost today.

Light In The Darkness

Isaiah 50:10-11
10 Who is among you that feareth the LORD, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the LORD, and stay upon his God.11 Behold, all ye that kindle a fire, that compass yourselves about with sparks: walk in the light of your fire, and in the sparks that ye have kindled. This shall ye have of mine hand; ye shall lie down in sorrow.

There are times in our lives when, as Christians, we are called to serve God in the midst of darkness. There are times when it is difficult to see very far ahead. Like driving on a dark highway on a moonless night in the middle of a rainstorm, our lives sometimes feel as if we are going nowhere fast and we are not sure if we will make it to our destination.

It is interesting to me that many Christians desire to be “overcomers”, but do not want much to overcome. We want to go to heaven, but we do not want to die to go there. We want our faith increased, without having to rely on anyone. We want all good times, all the time, and that is simply not how life works. Life is filled with melody and misery, high times and hard times. You may be experiencing a dark time right now, what many saints of the past termed “a dark night of the soul.” You may be at a point right now where you aren’t able to make sense of what is happening in your life. There are times, seasons in our lives, where we have studied the lessons, learned our formulas, memorized the promises of the Bible and think we have it all figured out — and suddenly we are plunged into a deep, deep darkness.

What do you do when the lights go out? When deep darkness comes into your life?
It has been said that in school one learns the lessons first and tests second. In life, we take the test first and learn the lessons second. Hopefully, today you will come to see that there are lessons to be learned when the lights go out.

Who is among you that feareth the LORD, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the LORD, and stay upon his God

In this verse, the Bible is talking about a faithful servant of God. This person loves and fears God. He or she is being obedient. This is not a backslider or someone who has wandered off from God. This is an active Christian who loves the Lord and is being obedient to God’s voice, yet they are in a dark place.

There is a distorted idea out there that once a person becomes a Christian it is all honey and no bees. Not true. It rains on both the just and the unjust. There are tens of thousands of Christians who love God and are obediently serving Him who are experiencing dark times. Over a hundred thousand are martyred across the globe annually.

Job said, “God has put darkness in my path” (Job 19:8) Habakkuk exclaimed, “How long shall I cry out and you not hear?” (Hab. 1:2) John the Baptist sent messengers to Jesus from the cell in which he was imprisoned asking Him if He really was the Messiah. Each of these godly men came to a point in their life that they did not fully comprehend. They experienced a time of darkness, when they did not understand what was happening to them nor why God was allowing it.

When you are in darkness it doesn’t necessarily mean you have sinned or that you are outside of God’s will for your life. It might be that God has put you in a dark time so that His light shines brighter and you can see Him more clearly.

Faith is like film. It is developed in the dark. We grow the most spiritually when we are forced to look to Jesus alone for help. You will never know how much you need Jesus until Jesus is all you have. As Christians, we are called to live by faith – not by explanations. Our verse tells us to trust or lean on the name of the Lord. Even when tough times come. If you do not have the conviction that God is good all the time then you will not stand when darkness falls. Job said – “even if He slays me I will trust in Him.” When walking in darkness we must trust, lean on, God and His promises – which never fail.

When you are in the dark you don’t need explanations. You need God. An explanation sometimes makes things worse. Sometimes God removes all the answers to give us Himself. A relationship with Him is more important than reasons. In his blindness, John Milton wrote Paradise Lost. In prison John Bunyon wrote Pilgrim’s Progress. In exile, John wrote Revelation. In the dark, God develops our faith. Never doubt in the dark what you learned in the light. The test of our character is what we do, how we react, in the dark. God is still God when the darkness comes. He is still reigning on His throne. He still works out things for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.

Some things, some truths in life, are only learned in the dark. For example, have you ever said, “the stars are out tonight?” Did you know they are out in the daytime but you cannot see them because of the sun’s brightness? There are some treasures, some beautiful things that are only revealed in the dark.

Psalm 148:3 says the stars are there to praise the Lord. Do you have a star in your darkness with which to praise God?

Here are some treasures of the dark. In the light, we see things that are near. In the dark, we see far away – light years away into outer space. We may think our brightest thoughts in the day, but we think our deepest thoughts at night. In the light, we see more clearly. In the dark, we see further. There are some aspects of our future God reveals to us in the dark. If you are praying for God to reveal to you what is next up for your life, be prepared for dark times so that He can show you things that are far off. Just ask Daniel and John about that.

Behold, all ye that kindle a fire, that compass yourselves about with sparks: walk in the light of your fire, and in the sparks that ye have kindled. This shall ye have of mine hand; ye shall lie down in sorrow.

There is a danger in the dark that Scripture warns us about. One of our most dangerous temptations is that we will be tempted to light our own fire. That is the warning of verse 11. If God has placed darkness around you, then you need to wait on God to remove it. It is better to be in the dark with God than to stand alone in man-made light. Do not ever give into despair during dark times. Darkness cannot overcome light. Remember, you don’t open a door to let darkness in. You open a door to spill out light.

If light has been removed from the situations in your life, then God, in His wisdom, has allowed it so that your faith can be developed and so that He can show you a glimpse of the future. If God is the One who has placed darkness in your path than do not be so foolish as to light your own fire. A man made fire is deceptive. It is not a sure guide to follow. God says that if we light our own fire in the middle of a God ordained darkness we will suffer.

Abraham and Sarah could not wait. Abraham created his own fire with Hagar to produce Ishmael. Untold centuries of suffering have followed his decision. Has darkness come into your life? Are you waiting on God or trying to light your own fire?
Even in the darkest of nights the sun will still rise and chase it away. Eventually God’s light will shine again and the lessons you learn in the dark will last for all eternity. You will see things and know truths that you had never seen or known before. Weeping may endure for a night says Psalm 30:5, but joy will come in the morning.

Remember this, when you are walking on a sunny day, feeling the warmth of the sun’s rays, those rays are 8.3 minutes old when they reach your face. Even though you feel the sun’s warmth, you have never experienced its full intensity. The sun’s surface temperature is approximately 10,000° F. Its inner core is in excess of 27,000,000 °F.(https://www.space.com/17137-how-hot-is-the-sun.html) You have felt her warmth but not her intensity.

Likewise, we can feel the warmth of God’s presence but we haven’t experienced the full intensity of His glory yet. There is coming a day when we will, but now we only see a fraction of it. When the lights go out God is still there, shining. He wants to give you a star to praise Him more. Our trials become stars in order to praise the Lord. When the lights go out, develop your faith, lean on the Lord, trust in Him and you will see further than you ever have before.